Stuff In My Brain

Return of the Pumpkin Round-Up

2011-11-03T06:49:00.002-06:00

Sadly, another Halloween has come and gone. Lady Di and I have snuck as much candy as we're going to get from the kids. They have hidden their stash in their rooms from us. I'm trying to teach Ruby the art of tracking. So far, she is no bloodhound.

Anyway, it's time for our annual Pumpkin Round-Up. This is where I force you to look through all my Halloween pictures whether you like it or not. This is the fifth year of Pumpkin Round-Up. If you would like to see previous year's pumpkins, go ahead and click here, here, here, or here.

Now, on to business. Let's start with Number One Son's Gourd's of Creativity.

It's pumpkins season and it's football season. N1S saved time by combining them.

His next pumpkin requires technical cleverness to figure out.

This is a smiling jack-o-lantern but it's not just a sideways face. Can you figure out the riddle? The answer is at the end of this post if you dare to continue!

Next in line are from Sweet Pea's gruesome collection. SP has been carving her own pumpkins for three years now and each year she creates a vomiting pumpkin.

Although, this one I believe just has a bad sinus infection. His friend is a skull but Lady Di and I thought it looked cute with a squash hat.

This one is a self portrait of SP. If you scroll down the right side of the blog you will see a picture resembling this. By the way, that candle skull lights up and was home made.

The next group of pumpkins were carved by yours truly.

I just couldn't pass up this warty lumpy orb. SP suggested that the bulbous bump should be made into an eye. So this is my mismatched eye pumpkin. And also my little squash buddy.

I call the next jack-o-lantern my Charlie Brown. I had a little trouble with the knife.

My last pumpkin is my favorite. It's carved in the style of The Nightmare Before Christmas and it is lighted with a green Christmas bulb.

And the best, I must confess, I have saved for the last. Lady Di's pirate pumpkin complete with silver tooth.

Eventually, I ran out of pumpkins and looked around the garage for something else to carve. We had two acorn squash that I carved into lanterns that we hung from two planters on the porch. The picture isn't too good but they really glowed with the porch lights off.

The jack-o-lanterns set the stage for a festive Halloween night.

SP dressed as a Titanic victim. I think she hoped that people would feel sorry for her and give her more candy.

And N1S was Darth Vader. He also made a sign that said "Please donate candy to build new Death Star". He said he got an extra candy bar from one home and another home jeered him. Must have been a Jedi home.

This is the Invisible Man holding his invisible bowl of candy.
Well, did you solve N1S's jack-o-lantern riddle? The answer lies on your keyboard just under your right pinky finger and just above the zero key. :) LOL

It's Not Halloween Yet

2011-10-19T17:12:00.001-06:00

Sorry it's been so long between posts but it is October after all. And everyone knows October first always marks the start of Halloween decorating season. The beginning of the month started with temperatures in the 80's. That was just too hot. I got the ghoulish gear out of the attic but had to wait for more seasonal weather to start transforming the yard.
Then, overnight, our temps dropped to 40's and 50's. Now I was ready. Unfortunately, Mother Nature still wanted to challenge me. As soon as the temps got to the 50's, the wind increased to the 50's too. At least it felt like 50mph. So now my orange lights are tangled and falling off the trees. Styrofoam tombstones are threatening to blow away.
I've got one more week to stake, hang and plug in before All Hallow's Eve. If the wind doesn't take everything away before then, I'll post some pictures.

Meanwhile, our new puppy Ruby has been helping around the house as well. She is now seven months old and is really excited for Halloween. Honestly, she is really excited for everything. She likes to chew her toys. She likes to chase balls. She especially likes to be chased. Which is why she is still on a leash when outside. She got away from us outside a few times which resulted in a chase three neighbors over. She has trained us to get the treat bag and kneel in the grass until she decides to stop running circles around us and get her treat.
She answers to her name. She just doesn't answer to 'come'. She has also obtained many names which may be confusing her.
Along with the name Ruby, she has also heard the names,
Ruby Duby
Ruby Doobs
Rubes
Ruby Dooby Doo
Ruby Tuesday
Ruby Begonia (That's from Grampa Gary)
Ruby Poo
Ruby Boo
And any other cutsie bootsie name that rhymes with ooby you can think of.
In addition to playing with her toys, she also likes to play games with us.

When she isn't playing or playing games with us, she likes to hang out under the couch. She will scooch her puppy butt underneath and peek out with her little black eyes.

She also likes to torment her cousin Rosie by taking her toys and then jumping on her face.

So far Ruby is working out to be a pretty good puppy. We often compare her unfairly to our previous puppy, Liberty. I'm not sure if she will ever measure up to Liberty. Liberty set the bar pretty high. Although, I think our memory of Liberty's first few years are a little fuzzy when it comes to her puppy naughtiness. We tend to compare Ruby now to Liberty when she was ten years old or so. When we could let Liberty run around the yard and not worry about her coming back or getting into something she shouldn't.

One thing Ruby does that is reminiscent of Liberty is her napping. For some reason, Ruby at seven months, will actually take multiple naps throughout the day. I don't think Liberty left us alone for a minute her first few years.
So, I guess, Ruby isn't too bad after all. We can probably be patient enough to see how she turns out in the next fifteen years or so.

In case you're wondering, yes we still have two kids. Just because I don't mention them in every post, doesn't mean they aren't doing something interesting too. Once I find where they are I'll ask them what they have been up to.

A Day to Remember

2011-09-11T08:35:00.004-06:00

Anniversaries are often times of celebration. They often involve getting together with friends or relatives that you haven't seen in a while to reconnect, catch up and enjoy each other's company. But anniversaries' primary purpose is to mark a significant event for remembrance.

Today marks one such significant event. There will probably be gatherings of family and friends. They will probably share stories of this day ten years ago. Stories of where you were when you heard the news. The only celebrating will be celebrating the memories of the life of a loved one lost.

But it all comes back to the primary purpose of an anniversary. To remember. To remember the ones who lost their lives. To remember the sacrifices made by the police and firefighters of New York. To remember the families and friends affected by the needless loss of life. To remember the reason why sacrifices are made. It's not easy keeping a country free. The freedoms we enjoy come at a price. Unfortunately, some people end up paying more than their fair share. We should not take our freedoms for granted. While we are remembering this tragedy from a decade ago, we should also remember to thank a vet, an active military member, firefighter, police officer or anyone else responsible for our safety.

Last year SP's and N1S's seventh grade cousin from Fargo entered a school contest to design something that honored the memory of all who sacrificed on September, 11th 2001. She came up with two pictures symbolizing what that date meant to her. The contest judges were so impressed that she not only won the contest, but her school decided to print her designs onto t-shirts to sell with all of the proceeds going to a veteran's organization in Fargo.

SP and N1s each have a shirt that they wear on most patriotic holidays. This year they wore their shirts to school on the Friday before September 11th.

Here, SP models her shirt. You can click on the picture to better see the detail that her cousin put into her design.

This is the back of the shirt. She incorporated the airplane numbers and the pentagon into her second design. The logo reads, "How Soon We Forget".

Many times we get caught up with what is wrong with the country. We need to balance that with what is right with the country too. Our country and the people in it are doing things every day to be proud of. Big things. Small things. They all count.

Take pride in your country. Appreciate what has been done for you. Return the favor.

The Last of the Summer Fun

2011-09-04T10:00:00.002-06:00

We are getting dangerously close to the beginning of September and the start of the school year. Once again we packed our lives in the pickup and headed northeast to Bayfield, WI to tent camp for four days. This is our third year in a row of camping here with our good friends who haven't yet packed up their gear midweek and changed campsites.

We had near perfect weather for the third year in a row also. Hot during the day and cool at night. The animals liked the cool night too because we were visited by many. The first night there was the noisiest night we have ever had to sleep through. The raccoons made not one but three separate passes through our campsite looking for food. In between raccoon raids, two White Owls were hooting back and forth like an Owl Idol competition. Then just as things quieted down for a whole fifteen minutes, and my eyes started to close, a pack of coyotes started to howl and yip. All these noises of nature would have been kind of pretty to listen too if it weren't for the thin piece of nylon tent being the only protection between my head and sharp teeth.

Perhaps the animals were drawn to our tent by our festive string of battery operated blue tent lights. Actually, they are Christmas lights but we didn't tell the raccoons that.

The second night we found out that duct tape doesn't hold lights on nylon very well. So the festive lights only lasted one night. Surprisingly, there were also no more nights of howling coyotes. Hmmm.

The weather was so nice this mermaid washed up on shore one of the days.

Our friends also rented a paddle board for the day. I don't think the kids did much paddling though. Instead, they used the board for a lot of falling in the water.

Later in the afternoon, we spotted some teenagers climbing all over a fifteen foot long log which had floated into the bay. They were about a hundred yards out. When the teens got tired and abandoned their find, Lady Di and her friend Kerry decided that they wanted that log. So they both jumped into the kayak that we had rented for the day and paddled out to get it. It took them about ten minutes to get to the log and about 50 minutes to tow it to shore. It was big and waterlogged and heavy. When they were within 20 yards of shore, a young swimmer told his dad, "Hey, I want to play on the log!" His dad, who had been watching LD and Kerry the whole time said, "For as much work as those two have gone through for that old log, I don't think they want to give it up so easily."

But it was so worth it. As soon as the log arrived, everyone from our two families immediately wanted to get on it and float. The boys even tried to pull it back out to sea but soon realized that they didn't want to invest 50+ minutes in the endeavor. Who would have thought that a big old log would be the hit of the beach?

The log is half submerged in this picture. It was also so slippery that a picture with all four kids actually standing on it was rare.

Since we usually camp the last week of August, it usually falls on Number One Son's birthday.

Here he is blowing out his birthday citronella candle surrounded by cupcakes. That orange ball on the table is our homemade ice cream maker. There is a metal cylinder inside the ball which holds the cream and vanilla. Ice and salt go inside the outer area of the ball to cool the cream. Once each section is filled with appropriate ingredients, it's up to the kids to play soccer with the ball to mix it into ice cream. It was a delicious thirteenth birthday party.

So that puts a cap to our summer of 2011. Now we can look forward to school starting in a couple of days. How will we ever get the kids to go to bed without White Owls lullabying them to sleep?

Smells Like Teen Spirit

2011-08-25T07:00:00.002-06:00

The big news around our place is that Lady Di and I are now the proud owners of a brand spankin' new teenager. As of 12:01 am Number One Son has now matured to 13 years. Even though we just drove him off the lot, he already has that teenage boy smell. We do have a sample can of Axe Body Spray that we hang around his neck to freshen him up a bit. In addition to the Axe we also picked up a basket of maintenance items to keep our teen looking new. We stocked up on soap,acne cream, deodorant, soap, three different sizes of shoes, ear plugs (for us) and soap.

He has been bugging us for a cell phone for a couple of years, so now that he has reached the responsible age of 13, we decided to implant a GPS microchip in his arm instead to know where he is at all times.

We also have pre-emptively removed his bedroom door to avoid the inevitable slamming.

We've taken out a second mortgage to expand our pantry to make room for the industrial sized cans of food needed to keep both of his hollow legs full.

We are also trying to prepare for the inevitable interest in girls. So far he still kids around with us when we mention the fair sex but we know that he is probably just showing disinterest to throw us parents off his trail. And I'm not talking about the trail of week old underwear snaking around his room.

Communicating with girls is a mine field for any teenage boy, but when you have Asperger's like N1S, it's like navigating that same mine field blindfolded, at a rock concert, wearing snow shoes. So I have put together a few sure fire opening lines to get him in the door.

Lines like, "You must be from Memphis because you're the only Ten-I-See." Or, "I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?" Or, " I don't have a library card, but do you mind if I check you out?"

And the never failing, "How you doin'?"

I'm sure these lines will do nothing but help N1S on his way to ladies-manness. They worked like a charm for me 15 & 1/2 years ago on Lady Di when I said, "Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"

Here is a short video of N1S's show choir performing the song '13'.

The End Is Near

2011-08-17T08:00:00.002-06:00

Our last month of summer vacation is always our last chance to actually relax. We purposely under-schedule August in the hopes of spending quiet family time together. But since nature abhors a vacuum, any space left open in the day automatically gets filled up with an event of some sort. This summer, to try something new, Lady Di took the kids up north to Grampa's lake to stay a few weeks. I, of course, would stay home and work which meant that at least one person in the family would have peace and quiet for a couple weeks.

But things don't move too fast at Gramma and Grampa's either. Most mornings found Sweet Pea sitting on Grampa's dock fishing. She would take a baggie of corn to use for bait and catch and re-catch sunfish. She always throws them back so I'm sure some of those sunnies are getting pretty fat and getting sore lips. SP has two fishing rods she is quite proud of. SP's cousin works at the local bait shop and gave her a good deal on a bright pink rod. It also has a reel that lights up when you spin it. When Grampa Ray saw all the fish she was catching with her new rod, he decided that she also needed a trolling rod for the boat. Somehow, he found a pink one of those to match. So now she has two really nice new pink fishing rods and is really getting some use out of them.

She also has discovered a passion for gardening. Grampa let's one of his neighbors use a spot on his land for a vegetable garden. So whenever Gene comes over to tend his plants, SP is tagging along at his heals and jibber-jabbering the whole time. She calls Gene her pea-pickin' buddy.

Here's SP's egg pealin' buddy.

Her brother is less interested in fishing or gardening or being outside. He will sit with her on the dock and help her with the net and getting the fish off the hook, but his patience doesn't last long. His idea of fun at Grampa's is watching the Twins play baseball while eating a bowl of ice cream. He also uses his time to play games on his 3DS and showing Grampa how to navigate his own computer.

Knowing N1S's interests, Lady Di broke her August scheduling rule and scheduled a Show Choir camp up by Gramma's house. So that makes three shows for N1S this summer. The camp in Bemidji had over 100 kids participating and they practiced three hours every morning for 1 week. This was something brand new for N1S and he didn't know anyone at the camp. Lady Di was a little apprehensive about dropping him off on the first day. "What if he gets lost? What if he doesn't make a friend? What if the kids are mean?"

We needn't have worried. He was excited after his first practice and said he had an awesome time.

LD asked, "Did you meet any new friends?"

"Yeah, but I don't know their names.", was his reply.

This is pretty standard procedure for N1S. He has learned a lot of friend social skills but he still has to work on remembering them at the time. We prompted him to remember by telling him to exchange email addresses with someone. He can usually recall anything related to computers.

At midweek the camp held a talent show for anyone who wanted to perform. With some encouragement from us, N1S consented to play a song on the piano. He said he did OK. There was one other piano player. He said the funny thing was that three entries performed Katy Perry's song Firework. He said by the time the third one came around everyone was pretty tired of Firework. On Thursday he found out that he and three others got picked to perform on Friday between their Show Choir songs.

I wasn't able to attend the show but LD, SP and both sets of grandparents were cheering him on. The talent show winners performed their songs for the first forty five minutes of the show. And even though there were four talent show 'winners' I know who was ranked as 'first winner'.

Then the entire show choir camp performed three songs. LD said that for around 1oo kids the choreography was pretty clean and everyone gave a sharp show. Of course we all know who was the sharpest and cleanest.

That night I called N1S to ask how the show went and to congratulate him. He said he had a lot of fun. I asked if he made any friends. He said not really. "I was just too busy practicing and I forgot." But apparently he did make one acquaintance. After the show one of the high school directors came over to him to congratulate him and they discussed something about N1S's Nintendo 3DS game. N1S then said, "Maybe I'll see you next summer." So I guess that means he wants to come back. It'll give him another chance to 'remember' to make a friend or two. And hopefully, they will be closer to his age.

We've reached the middle of August. The cicadas are buzzing the trees. School can't be that far away. In fact, I think I can see it on the horizon if I squint. Can we squeeze in anymore fun before Labor Day! We better hurry!

Show Me What You Got!

2011-08-09T07:33:00.017-06:00

Welcome back to our family slide show of our summer so far. Get ready for some shows, softball and swimming. Once we returned from SD at the beginning of June, Number One Son auditioned for a part in a local community education children's theatre workshop. The show was Willy Wonka Jr. and N1S was impressive enough to land the role of Willy Wonka himself. This production practiced three hours every day for 2 weeks. They used minimal props and costumes but concentrated on acting, singing and dancing.

Here is Mr. Wonka in his Choco-vison room. I'm not sure if he was singing or snoring behind his special goggles.

His good friend from school was also in the show playing Veruca Salt. I think they have been in about five or six shows together.

At around the same time Sweet Pea was playing softball for the first time. She got to hit for the first time. Well, maybe not this time. She got to pitch for the first time. Steeeeeeeeeeeerike!
She even got to catch for the first time. Trust me, it is her under all that gear.

None of the teams in her league had nicknames so the girls came up with one of their own. Since they wore yellow shirts, they called themselves the bumblebees. But as they improved with each practice they decided to change their name to the Killer Bees! I told SP that their team should all start buzzing when the other team was batting but it never really caught on. SP however, did convince N1S and I to help her make some inspirational posters to hang in their dugout during games. This is one of SP's.

N1S liked to come up with slogans for his posters. "Drive For The Hive" and "Bring Your Bee Game" were his favorites.

SP thought her team could get some help from the dark side with her poster. I think it's fun to use my lowest Darth Vader voice and read, "Bees, I am cheering for your team."

During SP's softball schedule, we had some of the hottest, most humid days of the summer. Luckily, the kids have an Auntie Sue who lets them swim in her pool.

Oops! I hope pink shoulders are in this year.

The schedule just got busier from there. While SP was playing softball and N1S was performing Willy Wonka Jr., both kids were practicing for their third Show Choir show. This Show Choir theme was 'Songs from Glee'. They, along with about 40 kids formed the junior choir with about 16 members of the senior choir. They started off the show with a song called 'Loser Like Me'. SP and N1S dressed as nerds for this song.

Next on the program was the song 'Cooler Than Me'. The kids are trying their best to look 'cool'. Shake it, SP!

N1S got to sing with the boys to the tune of Justin Bieber's "Baby". Each guy in the choir got to sing a short solo while giving the girls in front of the stage a thrill by touching their hands. SP was picked to be in front of the stage waving her homemade JB posters with her friend. For some reason SP insisted that her posters have multiple puppies and kitties to keep JB company.

They ended the show with a high energy, highly freaky version of Lady Ga Ga's song 'Bad Romance'. This one had a lot of masks, feathers and sparkle.

Now that brings us to the end of July. Only one month left to go.

Summer Memories

2011-07-31T07:46:00.023-06:00

I am greatly sorry for the long gaps between posts. I'm sure both of the readers I have left are staging a boycott as I type. However, since I have time to write and my kids have had time to pile up a barn full of summer activities, you will listen to every word I have to say!

Well, that just cut my readership in half.

I'll just start summer with Sweet Pea's birthday. Why would I start there? Because that's where my pictures start on the computer.

As you can tell by the picture, 'A good time was had by all'. Actually, I think SP was already dressed for bed judging by her clothes and hair. The black Muppet on her shoulder is Ruby helping her blow out her candles. I'm pretty sure Ruby probably just chewed SP's hair while she was huffing and puffing.

Next we headed west to South Dakota to attend my Grandma Peg's funeral. She was my pie baking grandma and our family was fortunate enough to enjoy 96+ wonderful fulfilling years. Funerals involve much sadness but they are also great chances to remember a life and reconnect with family members that you haven't seen in a long time by relating all the unforgettable memories we all shared.

Here are Number One Son and Sweet Pea enjoying time with their far away cousins. At least I think N1S is enjoying being with all of his girl cousins.

When we go to SD to stay with Gramma and Grampa we usually have to find a little time to golf. The kids are now old enough to swing a club and actually see the ball fly above the grass. Here N1S hammers one! Pay no attention to the small yellow dot in front of him.

SP's swing shows a lot of 'potential'. I'm pretty sure she connected on this one for a heckuva shot.

While we enjoyed our golf game we also took time to take in the beautiful surroundings. Just across the out of bounds fence on the second hole we had our own private gallery cheering us on. People from SD know that this is not an uncommon sight. We made sure to take some time to try to lure the calves over to us and feed them some grass but their mothers kept them pretty close.

After a long morning of golfing, we went to Gramma's house to relax. As you can see some of us were quite exhausted.

SP used her time to climb Gramma's big maple tree. It doesn't look too high but her feet are actually about seven feet from the ground which is pretty high for SP.

We are grateful to have family that we can visit and have fun with. Thank you Gramma and Grampa Bell for living close to a golf course next to a farm and for having big trees to climb.

And a big thank you to my Grandma Peg for her wisdom, guidance, support and love. And especially her pies.

We will always remember you.

Well that only brings us to early June. We have more summer to come. Tune in next week.

2011-06-20T10:15:00.012-06:00

Happy Belated Father's Day to all the Dads out there. I hope everyone had a chance to enjoy their day. If either couches, TV's or backyards were involved, the day was well spent. I unfortunately had to work but I still reaped the benefits of fatherhood when I got home.

Sweet Pea showed her generosity by cleaning out her room and wrapping it up for me.

It looks like she just wrapped herself up, which is gift enough for me, but trust me there are a garage sale worth of items under the pink crepe.

Here is what it looked like unwrapped. So many things that she had to use a bucket that she personally decorated with cut out pictures of puppies and kitties. My favorite.

My adventures in gifting started out with individually painted clay newts complete with hats and lamp. I was so excited that two second after receiving them I broke one of the lizards legs. Luckily, I'm a dad and have super glue in the garage.

The next group of gifts had the 'Nightmare Before Christmas' theme. SP drew a picture of Jack Skellington, Sally and the Doctor. I also got a clay Jack head and a playdoh like Jack head. I think she achieved a very good likeness in all three mediums.

This is her self portrait showing off the crackle nail polish that she bought with her own money.

The last bit of art work are these marine life scenes she made in an art class a little while ago. With the haul I made this year, I'll have the best decorated garage on the block.

The red bucket of surprises also a finger knitted tie for work which had a safety pin at the top to attach to my shirt. A stuffed moose, a cartoon journal and few smiley face pins filled the rest of the bucket.

Every Father's Day the best gifts are the homemade gifts. Even a coupon for a free nap of my choosing is better than anything from a store. I hope SP keeps exercising her artistic talents. As long as she does, I will have a space available in the art gallery.

Wonders of the World

2011-05-31T05:20:00.000-06:00

Do you ever wonder about things? Of course, everyone does. Listening to the radio today a caller to the show used the word 'fantabulous'. A combination of fantastic and fabulous. I have heard this word often before, but I thought, why haven't I ever heard the word 'fabulastic'? It's a combination of the same two words only reversed.

And everyone has probably used or heard the double combination words, absitively posilutely. Heck, those words are almost always used together. So why aren't fantabulous and fabulastic joined at the verbal hip? Just something I wonder about.

Something else that just randomly fell into my head is the phrase, "Bread-butt sandwich". You may not have heard of this before because I just made it up. It's a sandwich made with the last two slices of bread in the bag, or the butt ends. Also known as the bread that only Dads eat. Kids and Moms will always refuse to eat the butt end of a loaf of bread. They won't even consider putting it in the toaster. Therefore, those pieces always get wasted in the garbage unless Dad steps forward for his bread-butt sandwich. Does anyone know who to call about getting credit for a new phrase once it sweeps the nation?

On an unrelated note, just recently, I overheard this conversation in the kids' bathroom while they were brushing their teeth before bedtime.

N1S: What smells in here?
SP: It doesn't smell in here!
N1S: Yes it does. Didn't you just go to the bathroom?
SP: Yeah, but I didn't go number two!
N1S: Well, it smells like you went number four!

What exactly would number four be?

SP wonders, "Does grass blink?" This is the question I got driving her to school one morning. Then when we were watching the movie Alice In Wonderland she turns to me and says, "I like this movie because all of the animals and flowers can talk."

I then observed, "Yeah, but the mushrooms don't talk."
SP then exasperatedly let me know with a subtle roll of her eyes, "Well, of course they don't talk."

Well, how obtuse of me.

I guess there are some things I will always wonder about.

PS:After finishing this post I searched for the phrase bread-butt sandwich and found this. I guess someone beat me to it. Wonder no more!

We Got The Beat

2011-05-22T09:00:00.003-06:00

No one can debate that the 1980's were the rockinest decade of all time. Who could argue that the hits that came out of 1980 will all stand the test of time? Spending our high school years in the 80's prepared us to Pump Up the Jam as well as the Volume.

Back then It was Hard For Us To Say I'm Sorry, but easy for us to say Hello, and then Hello Again. We also Said You, Said Me.

We were Born In the USA. Then we Took It On the Run to Africa and the Land Down Under.

Our decade had lots of Material Girls who Just Wanted to Have Fun, Smokin In The Boysroom. Girls like Roxanne, Rosanna, Billie Jean, Jessie's Girl and Sister Christian.

We were Footloose, Hungry Like the Wolf , Maniacs and we may have Given Love a Bad Name, but we sure Let the Good Times Roll and we never Stopped Believin'.

Sometimes we were Licenced to Ill and called Dr. Feelgood. But we also wanted Candy and Ran, Ran So Far Away in the Heat of the Moment.

So when we weren't Fighting For Our Right to Party like it's 1999, Dancing in the Dark at St. Elmo's Fire, we were doing our Final Countdown of 99 Luftballoons.

Now, however, Frankie tells us to Relax, but our Reflex is to Jump, Rock Like Hurricanes and Neutron Dance.

Only The Good Die Young and we are still around. In other words, We Are The Champions!

Oh Yeah! (Chicka-chickaaaah)

How Much Is That Puffball In The Window?

2011-04-19T09:48:00.004-06:00

Change is happening outside and along with the seasons, a big change is happening inside our home too. Some of you may have read a while ago about our beloved puppy, Liberty, passing away after 16 wonderful years. Well, apparently she had left a large vacancy in our lives that we needed filled. So last week, we had an addition to our family.

Her name is Ruby. She is a toy poodle pup. She is black and came with a lot of cute cred. She certainly has not replaced Liberty but is filling the void nicely. In fact, potty training is filling more than one void in our lives. I didn't realize how much idle time I actually had on my hands until the all-day-Ruby-watch started. She tries to act innocent and disinterested in pooping when we are outside. Then we come inside the house and she bides her time until I finally blink due to dry eyes from keeping a constant vigil to catch her before she does her business. She is tricky. Once she fills a void by emptying her bowels in the house, she resorts back to the innocent look complete with puppy dog eyes. Luckily, a little puppy has little poops.

Everything else is pretty normal. We've been showing her off to all our friends. Many of whom ask, "Is it real?" the first time they see her. Her size has caused her to be mistaken for a Beanie Baby.

We wanted to surprise the kids so we didn't tell them anything about getting a puppy. On the day we brought her home we took her to Sweet Pea's school at the end of the day. When SP walked into the office, her first words were, "It is real!!!". Followed by, "She's so cute. I love her!"

We've had Ruby for one week now and she is finally getting into a routine. In the morning we get up and immediately pee. Ruby outside, me inside. Then we come in for breakfast. She is so tiny that our old dog bowls were too deep for her. She eats out of a Tupperware lid and drinks out of a Barbie play bowl. Then Ruby plays for a half hour and exhausts herself. She then climbs to the top of the tallest pile of laundry she can find and zonks out for an hour or two.

The rest of her day is spent similarly. Sometimes she substitutes play time for curling up on Lady Di's lap or my shoulder. She only weighs about a pound and feels like she has bird bones. But she's pretty tough and likes to roll around a little.

In the evening we let her outside one more time to do her puppy business which she is sometimes reluctant to do. Mother Nature decided to play a trick on us and lower temps to the 40's and crank up the wind. We sometimes have to create a wind break for Ruby with our feet to keep her from being toppled by the mildest of gusts. She will often squat to pee and then race back to our feet to look up at us and whimper from the cold. I tell her she has to finish going potty. She looks around and then turns on the turbo-cute by adding a squeaky bark with her sad eyes.

Once in her kennel bed, we wind up the clock for the tick-tocking and set our alarms for every 2 & 1/2 hours to let her out for overnight potty breaks. It's funny how after Ruby finishes her nighttime business, I strangely feel the same urge to complete some bathroom business. It's also puzzling how I usually count only one overnight trip to the front yard, but Lady Di says she wakes up two to three times a night. Maybe the alarm is quieter on my side of the bed.

Hopefully, when the weather warms up a bit the potty training will get a little easier. Regardless, Ruby is earning her keep by entertaining us with cute puppy stuff with cute puppy toys. As long as her poops stay small she can probably stay.

Fun with Paint and Wood

2011-03-27T07:51:00.003-06:00

Ladies, start your engines! Our local Girl Scout organization hosted their 3rd annual pinewood derby race last week. Which means that once again, I had to clean the sawdust from my tools from last year's car and help Sweet Pea create another wheeled work of art. Each year I let SP choose how she wants her car to look. I try to cut, sand and chisel her wood block into a reasonably similar shape to her idea. Then I let her work her magic with paint and accessories.

To view previous pinewood derby cars just click here and here.

This year SP decided she wanted her car to look like one of the minions from the animated movie, 'Despicable Me'. A minion is a cute yellow Tylenol-shaped worker who wears goggles and denim overalls. This design was actually much simpler for me because I only had to round off the corners of her block and glue a round, washer holding cup to look like a one eyed goggle. Did I mention that some minions have one eye and some have two eyes?

So, using the DVD case as a guide, SP created a very believable likeness with bendaroos used as arms.

SP decided that her minion would have a smug, contented look about him so she drew an eye with a half closed lid. You can't see from the picture but her minion has one black curlicue hair on top of his head.

Our cars usually are not made for speed, but this year SP won her first heat and got second in her other two heats. Not good enough for a trophy but still OK.

So when SP wasn't racing, I had plenty of time to view the competition. About 160+ cars of competition.

There was evidence of much creativity among the wheeled wood blocks. Some cars had better paint jobs than the van we drive.Each girl scout got to vote for their favorite cars. This walrus car won for 'Most Creative.'

Here is some more of the girl scout's artistic ability. Someone actually carved that panda bear riding a toboggan. We also saw a car with working headlights.

With all of the talent and creativity on display, SP got some good ideas for next year. I will have to look into how to install headlights and probably add a working radio too. Hmmm...a derby car in the design of an Ipod perhaps?

Lenny the Leprechaun Strikes Again!

2011-03-20T09:38:00.024-06:00

Did anyone catch the leprechaun last week? Sweet Pea gave it another try this year. Last year she set up an elaborate trap involving string, bait, weights and triggers to ensnare the elusive leprechaun. This year she modified her efforts by rigging an alarm to wake her when the leprechaun went for her bait.

SP's bait was a trail of homemade paper coins leading to an upside down wastebasket suspended with yarn by her bed. The trail of coins started at the other end of her room next to a note placed on top of her alarm clock. The plan was for Lenny the Leprechaun to read the note (stating press here for gold), press the alarm button, waking SP just in time to spring her trap.

SP's enthusiasm even got her brother in on the action too. He left a trail of paper coins too, not leading to a trap but to a list of leprechaun questions. His letter started out by wishing the leprechaun a lucky day and that he left a cup of Granny Smith Sweet Green Apple applesauce for him. He later wrote that his mom took the applesauce and he would have to find it in the refrigerator. N1S also wrote that he will not be setting any traps. By morning all of N1S's coins were gone and his questions were all answered in green marker. The leprechaun also signed his name in Gaelic which he must have looked up on the Internet. I'm pretty sure Number One Son knew what was going on but he still played along for his little sister.

I guess the leprechaun was too wily to fall for SP's note. In the morning SP's paper money was gone, but the kindly Lenny left her a box of orange flavored Tic-Tac's in trade.

I'm not sure if SP really expects to catch a leprechaun each year or if she just intends to trick her parents into giving her a treat every March. Either way, I'd say we all are pretty lucky to have Lenny to entertain us.

Are You Game?

2011-02-14T08:48:00.006-06:00

How many board games do you own? If you are a board game family you know that the number is probably in the double digits. If you are not a board game family, you have a lot more shelf space in your basement than I. I grew up in a board game family. Lady Di also grew up playing games and cards at the dining room table with her family. To this day I can only win 1 out of every 10 games of 500 against Lady Di.

Which brings me to my original question, 'How many board games do you own?'

I was staring at our wall of games in the basement last week and I wondered, "How did we accumulate so many long flat boxes of fun?

Most of the blame can go to our parents. They are the ones who planted the game playing bug in our brains. Somehow, we also got the bright idea that a new board game every Christmas was sane. That way we could play a new game every Christmas morning as a family. After the new video games got boring, of course. Which is the beauty of board games. They always play differently each time you play. And I'm not talking about the strange way the rules tend to change to fit the needs of the current rule keeper. And why does every game have a rule to gang up on Dad and send him back to Sorry land or make him Draw Four or force him to pay for multiple stays in a fancy Boardwalk hotel every time?

Anyway, our grand total as of last week was 53 games! Games with and without boards. Games with dice, cards, pop-o-matic die, money, tiles, spinners, letters, numbers, colors,blocks, clay, pencils, paper, sand timers, and buzzers. Games with lead pipes, revolvers, top hats, thimbles, pegs, pawns and pigs. Games that give us Trouble, Cooties, Ants in Our Pants, Mystery Dates and Free Parking.

That total doesn't count the multiple packs of playing cards, memory cards, flash cards, match cards,Uno cards, Star Wars cards, Old Maid, Go Fish, Crazy Eight, Bandits, etc.

I also didn't count the 14 games that are currently on our summer garage sale pile.

We currently have 9 games whose name ends with the letter 'O'.

We have 3 different Monopoly games. Original, Star Wars, and Wizard of Oz.

We have 13 Parker Brothers games and 20 games from Milton Bradley.

We have 4 games that require shouting something. Yahtzee, Jenga, Uno and Sorry. I don't think Jenga actually requires that you shout Jenga when the blocks topple but that's how I play it.

We have only 1 game with a large mat with large colored dots.

We have games for small children like Don't Break the Ice and Candyland. And games for big children like Taboo and Catchphrase. We have smart (N1S & SP) people games like chess and cribbage. And for the other people (Dad) we have Taboo and Catchphrase.

Do we really need this many games?

I don't think we will make it through this winter without them. Our weather has been so hostile that it's daring us to just try and survive it. So with no where to go and nothing on TV, we turn to our cheap family entertainment. A little bit of cardboard, ink and plastic to arm us against cabin fever.

So I'm back to asking, "How many games do you own?" "Is it enough to last the winter?" And which are your favorites?

Our Fifteen Year Journey

2011-02-03T07:42:00.006-06:00

We have had some sad news in our family recently. Our 15+ year old puppy, Liberty, passed away last Monday morning. Based on the pain we are all feeling, she was truly a member of our family. I know some people will say she was only a dog, but Lady Di recently heard a wise saying stating "Some people love their pets, some people have pets."

Lady Di has had dogs as pets her whole life. Liberty was my first dog. We got her from a farm in South Dakota just after we got married in 1995. She has lived with LD and I in each of our four homes together. We house trained her in our first rental home when she was a little ball of black fur. I can remember tiring her out before bedtime just by running with her to the end of the block and back.

She was always a smart dog. She learned her tricks quickly. She had a basket of her toys that she knew by name. If we told her to get her rope, she would sort through her basket until she found the rope. We tried a few times to give her squeaky toys, but she was always determined to work on that toy until the squeaker was removed.

There were also many Christmases where Liberty would sneak under the tree, remove only her present and start unwrapping it. This last Christmas was the first one that Liberty started unwrapping one of N1S's gifts. She must have had trouble reading the tag with her poor eyesight. In 1998 Number One Son arrived and Liberty needed to stay with Gramma and Grampa for a few months while Lady Di was on bed rest and N1S grew in the NICU. When N1S finally came home, Liberty would take her naps under his crib as if she was guarding her new brother. Shortly after, Liberty's walking on the leash time decreased due to a new baby in the house. But she quickly learned that her table scrap opportunities greatly increase beneath N1S's high chair.

In 2002 Liberty finally got a little sister, Sweet Pea. Liberty's play time took another hit as the kids tended to monopolize most of our time.

So this is the first time in the kids' life when they don't have a dog. News of Liberty's death affected each kid differently. N1S was quite matter of fact about the whole thing. He woke up Monday morning and saw her lifeless body and came to tell us without shedding a tear. We found out later that he broke down once in school but luckily he had some great support there.

Sweet Pea was quite emotional. I woke her up for school on Monday and told her I had some sad news. She guessed what happened and we both sobbed on her bed for a few minutes. Now SP goes around the house finding things that remind her of Liberty. She also wants to make a scrapbook for her puppy.

Both kids however are handling it well in their own ways.

Lady Di and I are having a more difficult time of it. When you have a dog you treat as a member of the family for 15 years everything reminds you of her. Having crumbs on our kitchen floor for the first time in a decade and a half is one thing you don't realize will trigger so many memories. Each room in the house has it's own special moments that make them seem incomplete now.

Included among the many things I will miss is having a lap warmer on cold Minnesota winter evenings. I will miss her whenever I do yard work in the summer. She won't be contentedly sitting in the shade keeping one eye on me and the other on the neighborhood. I will miss the merest whisper of the word 'popcorn' making her ears prick up instantly from the deepest of naps.

She was what I call a low maintenance dog. She didn't eat much, didn't poop much. She didn't shed, didn't chew and didn't run. She could ride in the car for five hours at a pop without a stop. I can't say that for anyone else in the family. Even when LD and I brought up, on Sunday night, how we would decide whether or not to put her down, Liberty seemed like she wanted to take the burden of deciding from us and passed on early Monday morning.

We can find some solace in that we were with her until the end. With tears flowing I was able to feel her last heart beat.

Our brother-in-law, a multiple dog owner of many years, believes that you get one really good dog in your life. We were lucky to hit the jackpot with our first.

We will place her collar and a few toys in a box and bury it next to Grampa's lake up north where she liked to swim and where she just about drowned one summer trying to swim out to our boat in the middle of the lake.

Hopefully, she is being a good girl where she is now and can wait patiently for her family to come home.

Liberty Bell

7-4-1995 to 1-24-2011

All Hail the Plow!

2011-01-08T04:37:00.001-06:00

Every year our favorite snow plow driver, Ronnie, pushes a large pile of snow in our cul-de-sac. Over the last few years the kids have delivered cookies and drawings to Ronnie on the job, which has probably led to our favored snow status. I have chronicled snow hills of the past, (click here, here, and here) but this year, Ronnie outdid himself. We were blessed with an early heavy snowstorm and our snow hill grew to about twenty feet high or so. The largest mountain we have ever had the privilege to be king of. The kids immediately took my best spades and started tunnelling. With this hill's size the kids were able to honeycomb their mound like a sponge.

Every year we have to warn the kids that our snow hill won't last the winter. The city usually leaves our cul-de-sac mountains for a couple of weeks before they bring in the dump trucks to haul all the fun away.

Well, last week Lady Di was in the kitchen when she heard the low rumble of trucks pulling into the street. "Uh-oh", she thought. "Better start warning Sweet Pea to avoid the meltdown."

But it was too late. SP heard the trucks too and ran to the window.

"No, no, no, no, no, no,...", repeated all the way up the stairs to her room. Her window over looks the front of the house so it has a direct view of our soon to be smaller snow hill.

LD then got on the hot line to our neighbor, Deb who also just happens to be friends with our plow driver, Ronnie. "Deb, you better call Ronnie on his cell or we're gonna have troubles!", relayed LD. Deb answered with, "I'm on it!"

About a half hour later, Ronnie shows up with his loader. We know it's his job and we know the snow has to be cleared for safety, so we can't really blame him. Plus, chances are we will probably get more snow this winter anyway. As Ronnie drove into our dead end, he stopped and studied our hill. Then he went to work. He carefully scooped as much snow as he could from all around the base of our giant snow cone. That filled one dump truck. Then with even greater care, he started slicing the sides of our snow like a sculptor shaving away layers of marble on his way to carving a masterpiece. When the last dump truck was filled, we were left with our honeycomb in it's entirety, but now it rested on a smooth round base. Much like an Easter egg drying on a ring of cardboard. Ronnie had filled his quota of dump trucks, but left the best part of the hill towering high.

Before he left, SP ran down the stairs and out the door without even putting on her coat in the cold 13 degree air. LD, caught unaware, quickly put on her boots and went out to retrieve SP. By the time she opened the door, SP was just returning to the front porch. She was carrying a large piece of paper. On the paper, SP had colored a large 'Thank You' and was holding it up for Ronnie to read.

Since then, the kids have dug a cave below their tunnels to give their pile an 'Old Man Winter' face. Hopefully, he will be able to stay around awhile longer.

Thanks again, Ronnie. We really appreciate it.

A Christmas Message

2010-12-27T04:48:00.010-06:00

Merry Christmas to one and all. I hope that everyone enjoyed their celebrations as much as our family did.

Now since I'm sure you are all sitting on pins and needles, filled with anxiety about the happenings of our Christmas adventures, I will relate our entire holiday itinerary for your enjoyment and fullfillment.

Actually, I just have one small bit of interest about our Christmas Eve night. We started Chistmas Eve by going to our 7pm church candlelight service. We really enjoy our church. So much so, that two years ago, when our church needed new hymnals, we bought three of them and donated them to the church in memory of two of my grandfathers and one of Lady Di's grandfathers all of whom had passed in recent years. That was two years ago and we have yet to find one of those hymnals during service. It doesn't help that we always sit in one of two pews at the front of the church. But I still check the inside cover of the hymnals there just in case the ushers, for some reason, decide to rotate the stock every once in a while.

So back to our Christmas Eve service. It was much like past Chrismas Eve services. We sang carols and everyone got to light their little candles while singing Silent Night. This part is the kids' favorite and every year we recite the proper candle lighting procedure. Never tip a lighted candle! Then we view the reason for such a rule, a tiny spot of melted wax on the seat of the pew just in front of where Number One Son stands. This family tradition goes back about five years or so when N1S was less diligent about his flame.

Just as the service was wrapping up, Lady Di noticed that the 9pm service would feature a choir selection and a song by a quartet including a student home from college that we know to have a very good singing voice.

LD then said, "Oh we will have to come back for the 9pm service."

N1S and I both turned simultaneously and whispered with incredulity, "Not two churches in one night!"

Sweet Pea's face lit up because she would get a second chance to play with fire.

So we went home to relax a little before we returned to church. We couldn't even change out of our church clothes! The drive back to the church was a little grumbly from half of us. But N1S and I put on a happy Christmas face and made the best of it. Since we had already heard the sermon, we decided to sit closer to the middle of the congregation. We found a nice couple that we knew to sit with. We enjoyed the choir selection and were quite impressed with the quartet. As we waited for the ushers to start the candle lighting, I noticed the hymnals in front of us. I said, "What the heck.", and opened it. On the inside cover was placed an offical looking sticker stating, This hymnal donated in memory of Emery (Pete) Bell, my paternal grandfather.

I passed the open hymnal to Lady Di, who was so proud of herself for not tearing up during the 7pm candlelighting, and made her immediately well up with emotion and ask for a hanky. Then Sweet Pea saw her name (she is named after this grampa) and passed the hymnal down the pew to show the couple we were sitting next to.

What were the chances that we would attend a second church service, on Christmas Eve, and choose that particular pew to find one of our donated hymnals for the first time?

It made pastor's message about the importance of family even more meaningful.

With all the blessings we have been fortunate enough to enjoy, this warm Christmas message from our loved one will make this year one of our most memorable Christmas Eves.

Live Long and Decorate

2010-12-22T07:37:00.008-06:00

Christmas is almost here. Are you ready? Have all of the cards been sent? Presents wrapped? Cookies made? And then eaten? And then made again?

Well, in order to save some time with this year's preparation, Number One Son volunteered to put up one of our Christmas trees. As you may remember from posts past, we usually decorate three Christmas trees. In early December, with Sweet Pea's help, I was able to assemble, light and decorate two of our trees but ran out of weekend for the last one. So as another busy Sunday night had us running Sweet Pea to volleyball practice, I offered N1S a project to keep him from thinking about the Wii time he had already spent.

"While we are gone, you can put up the tree to help me out.", I asked.

Surprisingly, he said OK.

On the drive back home, I wondered what kind of job N1S did. Would the small branches be on the bottom? Would anything break? How bad would the tree lean?

My fears, however, were unnecessary.

He did a pretty good job. It even looked like he started to shape a few of the branches. Like maybe about three. But then decided on the natural scraggly look with bare spots to show off the metal pole.

And just like any good assembly job, you always are left with a few spare parts right? I asked, "Wouldn't these three branches fit?"

Distractedly he answered from the couch, "Oh I don't know. They must have been extra."

I thanked him anyway for saving me time and effort this season. We decorated the trees the same way as last year. The only difference being that Sweet Pea did most of the kid tree decorating.

If you look closely you'll notice that Mr. Spock must have gotten a puppy from Santa this year to help him at his science station.

As did Dr. McCoy.

So boldly celebrate Christmas, where no one has celebrated before!

Sixth Grade Wilderness

2010-12-17T03:22:00.001-06:00

Last month I was lucky enough to be chosen to chaperon N1S's sixth grade field trip to LLCC wilderness camp. N1S's three day, two night, sleeping in a dorm, in late November, in Minnesota with 100 other sixth graders, field trip. Was I chosen to chaperon or was I hoodwinked into it?

The forecast for those three days was 20 to 30 degrees F with a chance for snow each day. The A group of sixth graders that went two weeks earlier had temps in the 60's with sunshine.

Despite the cool weather, we still had a lot of fun and weren't really that uncomfortable.

We started our adventure with a two hour bus ride. As bus rides go, this one started out fairly civilized. Halfway through we visited a rest stop to stretch our legs. That only proved to wake up the louder kids in the back of the bus who started 'singing' Christmas carols. The closer we got to the campground, the louder the singing became. The crooning had crescendoed to shouting by the time we reached our destination.

When the bus stopped, one of the teachers cleverly chose six volunteers to help unload the suitcases and bags from the trailer. It was surprising how many of the 'best' singers were chosen for such an honor.

Once unpacked, we were directed to the mess hall where KP was explained. I tried to bring some of the KP excitement home with me but N1S must have lost it on the bus.

Here are our table mates from table nine. The rockinest table at camp! Everyone said so.

For two and a half days we were scheduled from 8am to 9pm. We went on a bog hike. Yes, that's a hike through the bog. Not a swamp, and not a wetland. We learned that those are totally different. With the snow it was a pretty hike though.

This was where our guide got us lost in the bog. Apparently, she hadn't been on bog duty for a while and the new snow made the multiple trails confusing. She ended up calling for backup and one of the staff members back at camp rang the school bell to point us in the right direction home.

One of the activities that all the kids were buzzing about was archery. Quite a few arrows hit their targets, many more ended up in the woods.

I was just glad N1S loaded the pointy end away.

The kids also got to make a wilderness lunch. They had to gather their own wood, light their own fire and roast their own hot dogs. I think by the time the sticks got stacked and the birch bark lit, the kids were so hungry they only warmed their hot dogs in the smoke of their fire.

I think they are either waiting for someone to make a decision or for the fire to start itself.

For the last night we were there, the camp hosted a rendezvous. This was to demonstrate how pioneer trappers and traders would get together and celebrate with games like arm wrestling and tug of war standing on stumps. Just when the volume of the room had reached its peak with squealing and shouting sixth graders, the staff introduced leg wrestling. The parents in the room quickly exited to spare themselves the gruesome outcome of such an idea.

Luckily, no one lost a tooth or an eye and the rendezvous was a success in getting the kids all riled up before lights out.

On the last morning of our last day the staff hosted an orienteering race. Kids used a compass to find their way to checkpoints in the woods and race back to base with their card checked.

N1S placed second in his group. You can hum the theme song from 'Chariots Of Fire' if you want to.

Despite the cold weather, I think N1S had a fun time. And despite having to keep one hundred plus sixth graders from doing anything that would get on the local news, I think the parents had a good time too. N1S and I both got to meet and interact with new friends. And I am very proud of N1S for using good judgement and good friendship skills for his first overnight camp.

Yo, peace out y'all!

Is The School Haunted?

2010-12-04T10:31:00.005-06:00

A few months ago, Lady Di was nice enough to accompany her mother to the Mayo Clinic while she underwent some tests. This required an overnight stay for Lady Di, leaving me in charge of the kids.

First thing on the list was to let the kids talk me into going out to the Chinese Buffet for supper. As we sat in our booth enjoying our sweet and sour whatevers, a dad and his son sat in the booth next to us. Number One Son said, "Don't look, but that kid is kinda strange. He goes to my school."

And any parent of an Aspergers kid will know, that the act of N1S calling someone else strange is like Twitter calling Facebook a big waste of time.

So I looked.

"That's not a nice thing to say about someone.", I answered.

"He's always acting like a dinosaur in school, but I guess he's a nice kid.", N1S amended.

Then N1S got up and went over to talk to the kid which was a nice thing to do. It was great to see him use skills he has learned in his friendship groups at school. Aspergers kids usually have difficulty interpreting social cues, which makes initiating and maintaining friendships a challenge. Perhaps a kid who acts like a dinosaur in sixth grade could also use an extra friend to say hi at the buffet.

While N1S was gone, Sweet Pea turned to me and said, "I bet that kid likes to scare people."

"I suppose that's what dinosaurs do, huh.", I concurred.

"He probably hides somewhere and jumps out to scare people.", SP offered.

"Why do you think he does that?", I queried.

"Because he's the ghost of N1S's school.", was SP's answer.

After thinking for a minute, I realized what SP meant. I then explained that N1S said that the kid goes to his school, he's not the ghost of his school.

It seems that social cues aren't the only things that get misinterpreted in our family.

It's a Hard Knock Post!

2010-11-22T13:17:00.004-06:00

It's time again for my children's musical review. This is where I get to critique and rant about how the kids did in their most recent production, Annie Jr.. Actually, I usually just crow about them as any parent would. So get ready for some major proud parent crowing.

And speaking of crowing, N1S landed the part of Rooster and his little sister earned her role of orphan. While N1S had all of the funny lines, SP got more singing, dancing and stage time than her big brother.

Both kids had a blast though. N1S got to unleash some of his comedic skills and SP got to sing out loud. And the show started out with a bang too. This production was by far the best the kids have been in. When all of the orphans sang 'It's A Hard Knock Life', it sounded like a professional group. You could tell the kids really practiced hard for this one. There were no weak links at all. People familiar with local children's theatre will know that sprinkled through out each show are a few forgotten, rushed or too quiet to hear lines. This show had none of those and quite a few well delivered performances from the entire cast.

Here, SP just finished showing how she has a hard knock life.

All of the orphans sticking Miss Hannigan with a safety pin.

And then laughing at Miss Hannigan. The little brats.

Here is a short video of N1S's opening scene as Miss Hannigan's good for nothing brother, Rooster. The director told him to use a Jersey accent and he laid it on as thick as he could.

N1S wanted a picture with one of his good friends that he has shared the stage with for six shows. I think he also wanted a picture of his mustache which he asked to keep after the show.

This is N1S's big moment on 'Easy Street'. Make sure your volume is on.

And, of course, the big finale, singing 'Tomorrow' with President Roosevelt.
I mentioned before how impressed I was with this production, but it seems I say that about all of them. Well, it's true every time I say it. I'm very thankful to Acting Out (click for more pictures) for providing such a quality opportunity for youths to express themselves in a fun and positive way. We are so proud of our kids and the benefit they are receiving from these experiences truly can't be measured. Especially for N1S. He is not athletic and struggles socially with some of his peers. But the stage has given him a sense of pride and accomplishment that he hasn't gotten anywhere else.

Thanks once again to Amy and Kristen for taking our kids under their wings and helping them soar.

They aren't stopping here though. They will be appearing in their next musical 'The Elves and the Shoemaker' on Dec. 10th and 11th, so save the date.

And remember, you're never fully dressed without a smile.

Or a fake mustache.

Halloween Hangover

2010-11-14T09:31:00.004-06:00

Halloween has come and gone, but like a Minnesota goodbye, I'm dragging the season out as long as possible. I finally got the last string of orange lights in the box and stowed in the attic this week. Remarkably, tearing down the decorations took a lot less time than the two weeks it took to properly haunt our front yard.

So here is the official recap of our most favorite holiday.

Our Halloween spirit got an early start with a cookie bake with the kids at the end of September. I waited a full week into October before hauling out the boxes and chests and cauldrons of happy horror. Here is a picture of our house mostly spookified. I had a few more bats and cobwebs to add before the big night. You can click on the picture to enlarge it if you dare.

I rigged the owl on the left to have light up orange eyes to match the orange flame bulbs around the archway.

I, once again, unearthed a forgotten cemetery under our gallows tree. I put the same orange lights hanging loosely from the tree and added a black pumpkin with green lighted face.

Last year's scarecrow flew into town on his broom just in time.

And then the windstorm hit. We had two days of wind gusts up to 60mph.Poor Jack Scarecrow's post snapped in two.

Even cute little Spidey-poo got tipped over.

But don't worry, this story has a happy ending. The Great Pumpkin came through on the day before All Hallow's Eve and set everything right.

Now just a note about our pumpkins to wrap things up. I did a few new things with this year's jack-o-lanterns. I decided to put a string of purple lights in two of our larger pumpkins and have them flash on and off. It really worked great but I seemed to have lost the picture of them.

Since the lights worked so well, I put a single green bulb in this shark pumpkin.

N1S called this our disco ball pumpkin. I made it with two sizes of drill bits. The candlelight really did shine out like a disco ball.

This is SP's small gray pumpkin that she named Squidward.

And about five or six other jack-o-lanterns filled up the remaining empty spots in the yard. Next year I may skip the tall skinny pumpkins because they are just too hard to clean out. I'll also allow about three extra hours for N1S to design his jack-o-lantern. SP finished three faces to his one.

Well, only 300 odd days until our next haunting. But less than two month until the next house decorating. If you live in Minnesota, I hope you already have your Christmas lights on the roof.

Ghosts In The Graveyard

2010-10-29T09:02:00.005-06:00

We just can't wait for Halloween, so Lady Di and I helped Sweet Pea host a Fall party for some of her friends. There were no costumes so it wasn't a Halloween party. But the decorations, food and games definitely had a Halloween theme.

The weather threatened rain, but thankfully held off.

We started the night with a community service. A friend of ours sends small bags of treats overseas to a charity which distributes them to underprivileged kids. Our first party game was an assembly line bag filling contest.

Sweet Pea must have thought this was the 'make a face' picture.

Then the girls got to decorate their own treat bags to be filled later. The markers, stickers and beads entertained them for a while, but they started to get antsy. So we quickly moved on to boo bingo. Which is just like regular bingo except I would randomly sneak up behind a girl and yell boo at them. Number One Son assisted by running the bingo calling. And thank goodness he did. Not only did he buy us some time to sweep up stray beads and clean up wayward stickers, but he really had the girls entertained by building suspense before each call. He got them all cheering and groaning as a group for every call.

After all of the excitement and drama of boo bingo, we brought out the pizza and witches punch. Lady Di froze a pair of 7up filled vinyl gloves to float in the red punch bowl. One finger even broke off for effect.

Next was dessert. But the girls had to earn it. We hung three strings from the ceiling and tied donuts to them. So with hands behind their backs, each girl giggled and hopped and used their fishmouths to pull, lift or tear their dessert down.

Once their desserts were devoured, we needed to cool the girls down. Time to bob for apples! Some girls were clever enough to grab the apple stem.

A few girls got a good face washing. Some had eyes as big as apples when they came up with fruit in their teeth.

Next was walk the plank. We do this game for most of the kids' parties. Each girl was blindfolded and led up the plank and told to jump at the end. The object is to make the girls think they are walking up to a height greater than the six inch rise of the plank. Some of the girls knew what was coming. Some girls didn't want to jump but laughed when they found out the trick. One girl actually looked forward to jumping blindly into a deep pit and was disappointed when the truth was revealed.

By now it was dark enough for the bonfire. I got a roaring blaze going and settled into a lawn chair to enjoy the dancing flames. Unfortunately, I was alone in my interest. The girls decided to play Ghost in the Graveyard instead. Which is basically tag in the dark. And instead of counting to twenty, the 'it' person counts the hours to midnight.

But they must have tired just before the party ended, because they eventually gravitated to the fire like moths and told ghost stories. I threw a few color flame packets into the fire for the girls to ooh and ahh at the green, purple and blue show.

At 8 o'clock the parents came to retrieve their goblins. Fortunately, there weren't any fights and all the girls got along and all participated. I hope they all had fun and I was very impressed by their good manners.

Thank you Lady Di for putting on such a great event. And thank you for letting me cleanup the leftover pizza.

The Season for Sugar

2010-10-16T18:21:00.010-06:00

A couple of weeks ago I got impatient for Halloween to come so I tried to hurry it along. I consulted the Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook for inspiration. SP and I decided to tackle cut out cookies.

Lady Di has a killer set of cookie cut outs for every season.

I think another reason I wanted to make cookies was to actually see these bad boys in action instead of just sitting in the cut out tote in the cupboard.

We got all of the Halloween cut outs ready. Frankenstein Head, ghost, pumpkin, bat, cat and skeleton. The skeleton cut out was actually a gingerbread man. But with some creative frosting, bones and skulls appeared.

SP and I teamed up to take on the recipe. I read the ingredients and measurements. SP measured and mixed. She even cracked her own egg. I still have trouble keeping the shells out.

After mixing the dry ingredients with the wet ingredients I put the dough in the fridge to wait of three hours.

"What?!", cried SP.

"You have to let the dough sit to rise or age or just let the ingredients get to know each other well and get their cookie game plan figured out. Or something like that.", I informed her. "It just says so in the cookbook."

It was also a learning experience for me. I have cut out cookies before but I have never actually prepared cookie dough before. I was surprised to find out that the recipe didn't include opening a tube. But using the mixer was quite fun. Did you know that raising the mixer above the bowl while set on high will fling dough quite a ways? I also learned too late that you need to put flour on everything unless you want dough sticking to everything. It stuck to my hands, the roller, the cutting board and the spatula. Luckily, the dough stuck to itself and kept the shape it was cut into and out came Halloween cookies.

We found out that the larger the cut out, the fewer cookies came out of the dough. So once a Frankenstein head and a ghost were cut, the remaining dough got filled up with smaller bat patterns. We ended up with a whole caveful of bats.

The next step was even more fun and more sticky. The frosting.

Lady Di set up the most vivid orange, green and black frosting. We also got out the orange and black sprinkles. The first few cookies received much artistic attention to detail from the kids. Then when they saw the large pile left to frost, many cookies only earned one color of frosting each. Once the pile of cookies dwindled to only a few, the kids were tired of frosting and these cookies got a glob of each color of frosting to empty the bowls and swirled them all together producing an olive green brownish shade befitting the holiday.

Here's a sample of our creations. They range from cookies with a half inch of frosting and sprinkles to the duck shaped cookie on the right with one black frosting dot for an eye.

Once our desserts were prepared, we all enjoyed one cookie of our choosing. They were so good we treated ourselves to another. The rest found their way to the freezer. For some reason, once the cookies retired to the freezer, the kids completely forgot about them. So just to make sure they didn't spoil, I checked in on them regularly for the past two weeks.

Which necessitates the preparation of a new batch today.

Happy Early Halloween.

How Sock Monkey Saved Our Weekend.

2010-10-05T08:00:00.002-06:00

Last week my mother had to have her knee replaced. Apparently, all those years of chasing my sister and me around the house has finally caught up with her. She lives five hours away in South Dakota so I planned to leave Friday afternoon after work and return home on Sunday afternoon.

Lady Di was still a little dizzy from her ear surgery and Number One Son had a piano class on Saturday, so they elected to stay home. Plus, it was homecoming week and N1S was excited to see the local football game. And of course, 'see the game' really means hanging out with your friends and seeing how much Mountain Dew and Skittles you can get for five bucks.

So I asked Sweet Pea if she wanted to visit the golfing grandparents with me. She, of course, said yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,...

So Lady Di was nice enough to sneak some of SP's clothes into my suitcase along with her leopard print bathroom bag and we were ready to go. I made sure to bring along a Star Wars color book, some paper and crayons for the trek.

Unfortunately, about a half hour into our journey Lady Di called to say that SP had forgotten her pillow which was packed with her jacket, stuffed animal and most importantly her purple blankie. Then around a half hour later, SP asked if I could hand her pillow back so she could rest.

"Uhhhh, can you just use the blanket under the seat?", I offered.

"I like my pillow better.", she countered.

'I might as well get this over with.' , I thought.

"Mom just called and said that you left it on your bed. Sorry.", I consoled.

Surprisingly, she was only a little disappointed but she brightened up when I told her that Grandma's sock monkey is probably really excited to sleep with her tonight.

After that, she used the blanket as pillow to rest. Thank you Sock Monkey!

Around hour number two of our drive, the dreaded backseat question emerged from the shadows.

"How much longerrrrrr?"

About three more hours.

"Uuuunnnnnggggggg......"

Luckily, I thought of a game to play. Since we were driving to South Dakota and it was the first day of October, we played 'Count the Combines.'

I didn't grow up on a farm but like most small SD towns, we lived in the middle of farm country. Tractors cruising main street were given about as much notice as mini-vans at a soccer field. And my hometown community has seen more than a few wedding parties being paraded through town on a flatbed trailer complete with straw bale seating.

But for me, harvest season is special because it's the one time of the year that I get to actually see combines in action. I don't claim to know enough about farming to know anything about what they are actually doing. I just think if looks cool to see corn and bean fields getting mowed down in straight sections with the rows going on and on for miles. Each cornstalk standing broomstick straight marching single file all the way to the horizon only to meet the blue sky and a few cotton ball clouds. And as it gets dark you can see a small cloud of dust surround a few headlights, as the combine, like a caterpillar devouring a leaf, steadily munches away into the night. I would encourage anyone to take a drive in the country this week to see what I am talking about. And, if any farmers want to take a short break next year and let me drive one, I'll make myself available. As long as you are OK with few crooked rows.

As our game started, I spotted the first few combines which gave SP a picture of what she should be looking for.

When she spotted her first one she yelled, "There's another compound!"

"You mean 'combine', right?"

"Oh yeah. I got mixed up."

We saw mostly red and green machines. A few yellow ones and one gray with a red stripe. In the last hour of our trip our total reached sixteen combines discovered. Only one combine away from our record last year. But it was getting dark and getting late and SP zonked out in the back seat. We passed four more machines but I didn't tell her until morning. So now our new record is twenty combines spotted. Our new record didn't last very long because we spotted twenty six working combines on the way home on Sunday.

On Saturday, we got to visit Grandma in the hospital. She was a little pale and weak but in good spirits. SP gave her the birthday and get well cards she and N1S had made and she put them on her table to show the nurses.

Since Grandma's hospital was in Sioux Falls, SP and I made a little side trip the Ronald McDonald House there. This was where Lady Di stayed for two months while N1S was in the hospital growing from his premature birth. We had a big box of pop tabs to donate and SP got to sign the guest book. Sometime you should ask Lady Di about the time she almost burned Ronald's house down making toast.

We also got to visit with an old college classmate of mine who happens to own a restaurant in Sioux Falls. We showed up at Michael's Steakhouse and Dave gave us the best table in the house. We got to catch up a bit and enjoyed a great meal. Plus, Dave and his sister offer homemade cheesecake from their parent business, Epiphany Desserts. So after stuffing ourselves at dinner, SP, my dad and I all enjoyed a piece of the best cheesecake I have ever eaten. SP couldn't eat all of hers so she took it home in a Styrofoam to-go box which she decorated with a sad face with her finger nail.

"This is how my tummy feels.", she groaned showing me the box.

We did eat a lot.

This was a nice weekend to see my folks, my sister and my Grandma Peg. I really wasn't able to actually help them with anything until Mom can come home from the hospital. But I did get to eat cheescake...and see combines.

To Run, or Not To Run...

2010-09-30T07:58:00.001-06:00

As some of you know, I have recently discovered the joys of running for my health. And when I say 'joys', I really mean aches and pains. At this point, I have been running somewhat regularly for about a year and a half and by now I can tell when my body feels good and when it feels like a forty-one year old going 0n eighty. Luckily, for the most part, the good days slightly outnumber the challenging days, so I'm still motivated enough to go out and keep running. Just like the amazing golf shot on the last hole of an absolutely horrid round. Or the fish that nibbles your line five minutes before you'd planned to pack it in after five hours of taking your night crawler for a swim. As long as you end on a positive note, it's much easier to trick yourself into forgetting about the blood blister that forms on your right pinkie toe.

So here are the things that I love about running, along with the things that try to get me to consider ordering a thigh master and working out from the couch instead.

Number one on the list of positive influences to my running is my Ipod. This little miracle has almost single handedly got my butt into running shoes. At first, I just wanted to play with it, but now it's keeping my mind off what I'm doing so well that I don't notice my lungs burning so much. The down side is that I don't think I could run without my Ipod now. I forgot it once and all I had to listen to was the clomp, clomp, wheeze, wheeze cadence of my running. That 30 minutes was the longest 45 minute run I've ever had.

Another fun thing to use while running is my heart monitor. Lady Di got me one early on. It's a belt worn around your chest which communicates your vital information to your sport watch. So it's kind of fun to see your heart rate rise at the beginning of your run and it also keeps track of your minutes and calories burned. It also beeps if your heart rate gets too high which usually happens about 3 minutes into my jog. That's my signal to pull over and sit on the curb or use some stranger's lawn chair that happened to be left out.

One other thing I like about running is going downhill. If you ever think about starting a running plan, go downhill. It's awesome!

But I hate running uphill. So avoid going uphill at all costs.

During warm days I love turning a corner and running into a nice cool breeze to cool off. But running against the wind is awful. It feels like running through a bunch of wet blankets hanging on a clothesline. So always run into a breeze and never against the wind.

The main reason I run though is to remain healthy. At forty-one I'm no longer the athlete I once was. And the athlete I once was, wasn't all that athletic to start with. I also want to be around for my family as long as possible. I see running as adding time to my life account. Every step I take is another ten seconds of extra life that I can use for more running.

So on the whole, the positives still outweigh the negatives so I suppose I'll keep it up. There is only one more negative that I hope doesn't get worse. I'm really bothered by all of the women who check me out while I run. It's getting to be so many that I'm worried that people will start to talk. So if you are one of the hundreds that sit in your driveway on Tuesday and Friday afternoons, please resist. I know if will be difficult, but it's for the good of us all. Remember, try to restrain yourself on Tuesdays and Fridays between 3 and 4pm.

Giants In The Earth

2010-09-18T08:56:00.001-06:00

The days are getting shorter and the air is getting crisper, so that means Fall is fast approaching. That also means it's time to see what grew in the garden this year. You may remember last year's bountiful harvest. This year I changed seed to see if I would have a little bit better luck.

This year I planted corn, cucumbers and carrots. I decided that pumpkins will not grow in my shady acreage so I chose only vegetables that start with the letter 'c'. The letter 'c' loves the shade. Shade is cool, as are cucumbers. And just like corn, shade can be high as an elephant's eye, if you are standing next to an elephant. And I picked carrots because I wanted something orange to grow in the garden.
So around about the middle of July I had a couple dozen corn stalks about thigh high, three and a half rows of carrots and one cucumber plant starting to bloom. Then we went away for the weekend and in the course of two days, all of my corn stalks were trampled. After falling to my knees and shaking fists toward the sky screaming, I got out the magnifying glass to search for clues. Namely, small tennis shoe tracks. But, alas, we have pretty well behaved kids in our neighborhood, so no incriminating tracks were found. Do squirrels like to trample corn stalks and at the same time stomp on the horticultural dreams of a middle aged man just for kicks?
At least the cucumber and carrots were spared. In August, I picked no less than four six inch cucumbers before the vine dried up. I finally proved that something can grow anyway.
Last week, Number One Son and I dug up the three and a half rows of carrots. And let me tell you this, the size of the carrot showing out of the dirt at the top doesn't necessarily indicate how big the carrot under the ground is. It's somewhat like an iceberg in reverse. Usually, the iceberg under the water is much larger than the tip showing. My carrots had a top showing that was about as big around as a nickel. But when they were dug up I found out that some were about as long as a nickel as well. So quite a few carrots look more like carrot-balls than sticks.

Here is a fair representation of the range of sizes that were unearthed. Unfortunately, the produce at the left side of the picture was the most abundant. But along with the many mini carrots, there were some interesting shapes as well.

I named a few of the most unique vegetables that came out of the dirt. If you can't read the small print, it reads from left to right, Snowman, Hershey Kiss, Xmas Tree,Twister and Love.

Here's a close up of our favorite carrot of the season. I think it signifies all the love and caring I put into the garden this summer. Even though I kind of gave up after the corn stalk massacre and let nature do it's own thing.

These zucchini came from our friends garden but N1S was so impressed that he wanted to take a picture of them. He used the zucchini on the right for a gun since it grew a curved handle on the end.

But this year's zip lock baggie of carrots has encouraged me enough to probably try again next year. I will have to find some other shade loving vegetables or possibly try flowers.

Whichever I choose, you can be sure to see me in my bib overalls and straw hat endlessly toiling in the hot summer air working on my farmer's tan.

Remember When Slide Shows Involved A Projector And A Bedsheet?

2010-09-12T00:47:00.000-06:00

Glad you could stop by. Go ahead and get comfortable on the flower print sofa while I mix us a couple of 'Rob Roys'. Don't worry, we'll get to our weekly card game soon enough. First though, you're in for a treat. Our vacation slides just came back from the developer and I have them all loaded up in the projector. I tacked the bed sheet to the wall for our screen, so I guess we're ready to relive our entire summer with you.

What's that you said? Just sounded like a big sigh to me. Nothing? Ok, let's begin. Back in July we made the trip out east to the Wisconsin Dells. Did you know they have water parks out there? This is the one we visited for 3 and a half days. That's me at the top of the orange slide.
They even had one of them there fancy indoor water parks. Number One Son was showing off for the girls on the Wavy-Surfy thing.
Sweet Pea had fun on it too. Wipeout!!!And as if two water parks weren't enough entertainment, they had an indoor amusement park to siphon some more money from us. N1S is about half way up this rock wall during our race. I was climbing the wall just to the left of him. I was waiting for N1S at the top but unfortunately I was just cut out of the picture.

Well, how do you like the slide show so far? No, don't get up, there are plenty more slides to see. What do you mean 'it's getting late'? You just got here. Now put down your coats and sit. The little Lady will be out shortly with coffee cake and Sanka and then we'll start the card game as soon as the slides are done.

In this slide we see an actual mermaid the resort hired to swim around the park. She was a big hit with SP who is wearing the pink goggles. The mermaid swam all around the lazy river followed by a dozen or two little girls. It seems she was also a big hit with some of the teenage boys who were swimming. Haw haw haw!

I see the coffee cake has vanished. Hey Lady Di, your cake was a hit again! Well, that's the end of the slides. Just a minute! I meant that's the end of those slides. Now we can put in the second carousel of slides from our vacation to Madeline Island in Wisconsin for all of our enjoyment. Whoops! Looks like I put all the slides in upside down. Don't worry, it'll only take ten or fifteen minutes to turn all of them over. That'll give the Little Woman time to gather up those snack sets and get them washed. We've been having a little trouble lately getting our dishwasher loaded. It takes you about two shots and a beer chaser now, right honey! Haw haw haw!

There we go, that's better. We're getting ready to ferry over to the island with our friends and their family. Now these slides you'll really like. While on the island we camped in our tent for four days. We got to see a lot of nature while there too.
We saw a lot of deer at the campsite and while riding our bikes. Some were tame enough to let us get within 15 feet of them. Isn't this a great shot! If you can't see the deer, it's the tan thing in the middle of all of the gray, brown and tan things.

We also took a long family nature hike though the woods. And this must have been the year for mushrooms because we saw so many different kinds, shapes and colors that we had to take a picture of every one we saw.This slide shows the most brightly colored yellow mushrooms we saw. We literally found mushrooms of every color of the rainbow except blue. Yes, we even found purple.

Hey Honey, where did those other forty slides of mushrooms go? They don't seem to be in the slide carousel anymore. You don't know? Well our guests really wanted to see them.
Oh well, plenty more to see. You havin' trouble with your watch? You seem to be checking it every five minutes.

Anyhoo, we got to see some nice views of the cliffs on our hike too. Here, the kids got in the way of a nice shot of some old rocks.

On the last night of our camping trip, we took a family walk on the beach. We skipped stones, found driftwood and collected interesting rocks. Don't worry, we didn't take a picture of every rock we saw. Who would be dumb enough to want see that? We did, however, happen to have a full moon rising that night so we all lined up for a picture.

SP's dour expression comes from her accidentally losing her most precious and most interesting rock she found on the beach. A rock that she could NEVER EVER find another one like it ever in her whole life ever!!!

Well, I can see that your facial expressions are matching SP's for some reason. I hope it wasn't the coffee cake. So I guess we better just call it a night. I'll look around for those missing mushroom slides for next time. Sorry, we ran short of time for our card game. We'll just have to play two games next week. Haw haw haw!
What do you mean you're busy next week?

Workin' For A Livin'

2010-07-29T09:27:00.012-06:00

This summer Number One Son has decided to go into business for himself. And when I say 'decided' I mean we suggested it to him and told him he would. But we did it in a sneaky way.

N1S is always complaining about not having any money to buy the video games he wants. He actually has the money in the bank but once it's in the bank it stays in the bank. So we suggested that he ask our neighbors if they needed someone to mow their lawn this summer.

He made a couple of posters to advertise his newly formed business and put them on the doorsteps of each house next to ours. Our bachelor neighbor next door accepted N1S's terms and employed him immediately.

N1S was pretty excited to start. His excitement quickly changed after a few passes with the mower though. He must have thought that mowing the lawn was easy after watching his dad gleefully dancing up and down the yard performing graceful and acrobatic movements with the mower, creating intricate and dazzling patterns in the lawn, transforming mere grass into works of art. Let's just say that N1S doesn't have the same appreciation for the lawnitary arts that his dad has. He found out the mower is heavy, the air is hot and our neighbor's hills are steep. He's also discovering new muscles he didn't know he had. Those are called work muscles.

But I guess I too lacked enthusiasm for the glamour and privilege of sweating away my summer days pushing a heavy, polluting vibration machine at that age. I can still feel the blister between my ring and middle fingers from pulling the start cord twenty times before flooding the motor. And then I would have to massage my sore shoulder while I waited for the mower to 'rest' until I was able to try starting it again.

In my youth, my dad taught me all the 'tricks' to use when the mower wouldn't cooperate. You had to prime the motor just enough, but not too much. Sometimes I had to take the air filter off with a screwdriver and then use the screwdriver handle to 'tap' out some of the dirt from the filter. When those things failed I would start hitting the mower with the screwdriver handle anywhere I felt the mower would feel the sting the greatest. When that didn't work, I would ram it into a tree or kick it or yell some choice words of encouragement until I exhausted myself.

Then it would usually start with one pull.

In this picture you can clearly see the character being built in N1S.

Not to be outdone was N1S's sister Sweet Pea. When she saw him making his lawn mowing posters, she immediately started to work on her entrepreneurial venture.

She wasn't very excited for mowing lawns so she decided on something more in tune with her interests.

Poor SP has yet to land a paying client. That may be due to how she takes care of her own dog. There are many days when watching iCarly takes a higher priority than a full water dish. I'm also a little suspect of her qualifications when it comes to hamster sitting. Since we've never owned a hamster, what does she think she has to do to take care of one? I suppose she would entertain a hamster for the day by staring at it and petting it. Whatever she has planned, at least her prices are reasonable.

Does anyone need their fish walked?

How Much Can We Do This Weekend?

2010-07-22T08:46:00.017-06:00

Two weeks ago marked our first family camping trip of the summer. Our neighbors were kind enough to invite us to set up our tent alongside their campsite. We set up on Saturday afternoon and packed up on Sunday afternoon. We thought it was a good idea make our first tent outing of the year a short one. We also made sure the campsite was only about fifteen miles from home.

The campsite is on a large lake with a very nice swimming beach. So, predictably, we spent most of our time there.

We were also visited by our other neighbors who just happened to bring their boat to the lake. They were kind enough to pull us around the lake on their tubes.

The kids really were having fun despite their bored expressions. At one point their tube dipped under the water, flooding the tube. Once we noticed the kids were submerged, the boat slowed down to see if they were alright. Once the kids had air to breathe they both screamed, "That was AWESOME! Do it again!".

After an afternoon of swimming and tubing the kids were tired enough to sleep right through a rain storm that night. Lady Di and I, however, enjoyed the constant noise of a million rain drops trying to tap their way into our tent to soak us. Luckily, the tent proved water proof and the rain gave up around 2:30 am. We packed up our wet gear early Sunday morning and started the long drive home. Fifteen minutes later I was home re-setting up the tent to dry it out.

This left us just enough time for a short rest before surprising the kids with a trip to the X-cel Energy Center to see Star Wars In Concert.

When I say we surprised them, we didn't let them know where we were going. The kids only found out at the front gate when Lady Di told them to read what their tickets said.

Then we had to race to our seats because we were three minutes late thanks to the 'wonderful' detour signage put up by MNDOT.

It was difficult to get any good photos of the concert, but the music was very good and the sound was great considering we were in a giant hockey arena.
The concert consisted of a full orchestra playing score music from all six of the Star Wars movies in front of a large movie screen which showed various clips of all of the movies. The actor who played C3PO, Anthony Daniels, narrated the show introducing each movement. Every once in a while a laser light show would dance to the music too.
We had a twenty minute intermission to enjoy the Star Wars displays in the lobby.

The displays consisted of authentic costumes and props from the movies. In this picture Number One Son is trying to be cool by not smiling. Newsflash N1S, if you are at a Star Wars event, coolness pretty much gets checked at the door.

The lobby also had these large backdrops to take pictures in front of. Lady Di drew a laugh from the kids when she told them to stand in front of this moon. "Oh Mom, don't you know that's the Death Star?!" We couldn't get a picture of the kids with the Ewoks because they were laughing too hard when Lady Di called them bears.

Here we caught the kids red handed playing with fire again.

This wasn't a display. Just a dad and his kids, but Lady Di thought they were good enough for a picture.

After intermission was over and we had avoided buying a $30 program, we found our seats for the second half of the show. I saw more than a few families with the expensive programs though. And even though it was only 3:00 in the afternoon, I also saw many parents come back from the concession stand with beer. I can understand drinking beer at a ball game or even something cool like a rock concert. But this was Star Wars. This was classical music set to space movies. It all just seemed a little too nerdy for beer. But perhaps some parents needed a few beers to make it through to the end. I asked Lady Di what she thought of the show so far. She confessed, "This is torture for me."

She isn't much of a fan.

She also was a little bit miffed when she saw a couple dozen audience members video taping the concert from their seats. Then she realized that the lights from the camcorders were actually little pen sized light sabers that were sold in the lobby.

All in all it was a very busy weekend. Thank you G & P for letting us crash your campsite. Thank you D & T for towing us around the lake on your tubes and thank you Lady Di for enduring an hour and a half of nerdy torture for us.

Now what are we doing for next weekend?

Something Borrowed, Something Red, White & Blue

2010-07-17T09:27:00.013-06:00

Now that we are in the full swing of summer, we can enjoy the multiple seasons that summer has to offer. Baseball season, beach season and wedding season.

July 4th marked the blessed day that Lady Di's mother's brother's granddaughter got married. So that makes her my second-grand-niece-in-law. Although, I may be mistaken. I, myself, was riding Lady Di's shirttails all the way to the church. But even if I am a shirttail relative, my decision to marry Lady Di all those years ago legally entitles me the right to a piece of wedding cake and to dance the funky chicken in public.

You may ask, why would someone schedule their wedding on the 4th of July? Apparently, one of the bride's fondest childhood memories was of her dad taking her and her sisters to watch fireworks at this country club every year. And since we had no real firework plans ourselves, her wedding fit very nicely into our schedule.

I mentioned wedding cake earlier. To me, wedding cake is the highlight of every wedding. The vows, the tears, the toast, the bouquet tossing all take a back seat. Three types of cake were served. Chocolate, marble and three layer white cake with raspberry filling. Butter cream frosting was used on all. Whipped frosting may be healthier, but I prefer butter cream. And don't get me started on fondant!

Obviously, the wedding had a patriotic theme. And it looks like the happy couple enjoys motorcycles. Sweet Pea was in charge of cake photography.

She did take a break from photography to plant herself front and center for the bouquet toss. Luckily for us, the toss went high and right.

I said that cake was the highlight of the wedding but actually the highlight for me was when the bride's older sister sang an original song that she had written accompanied on the guitar to the happy couple.

The bride comes from a very musical family. Her grandmother plays piano and organ for their church. She has one uncle that plays piano and one uncle that plays guitar. Her father is also an accomplished guitar player. The bride and her two sisters also formed a band that they still play in called Trinity. And the music all started with the bride's great-grandma Ollie who can still pluck a pretty good folk song at 96 years old.

When the family music ended, the dance music began. And Sweet Pea was on a mission to dance her booty off to every song played this night.

I had to loan SP a dollar for this dance. I think it was a dollar well spent for such a nice picture.

The flower girl in the wedding was about a year younger than Sweet Pea, but that didn't stop her from asking Number One Son to dance. You could tell he was a little embarrassed but he danced part of a song with her. I guess he has now reached the age when he doesn't want to put himself out there as much as he used to. There weren't any girls his age at the reception, but I'm not sure if that would have helped him dance more or just serve to increase his embarrassment. He only found the dance floor for a few group line dances. The rest of the time he watched or blew bubbles with the bubble party favors.

Before the dance, SP went through about three tubes of bubble soap before the salads were served. After the meal, SP's older cousins showed her a trick they could do with the bubble soap. They each showed her how they could blow bubbles filled with 'pretty white clouds'. Then when the bubbles popped, the clouds would wisp away like the 'smoke' from a candle. I told SP that only her cousins could blow bubbles like that.

The evening ended with the fireworks show, of course. We had a front row seat for a spectacular show. I can certainly see why the bride wanted to relive such fond memories from her youth. The show prompted N1S to exclaim, "This is the best wedding I've ever been to!"

Born to Run

2010-06-12T04:15:00.007-06:00

Summer is finally here, although our spring weather sure has felt summerish already. Now all the surrounding small towns can start their summer celebrations and festivals. I really enjoy these cozy carnivals. It's a perfect excuse to eat a corn dog, drink a root beer float and still have stomach space for the spaghetti supper at the church. Then I can sit back and decide if I want to watch hockey, softball, volleyball, comedians, magicians, musicians or carnies.

I started the weekend by entering myself in the 5K road race. This is the third 5K I've run and I wanted to challenge myself this time. My goal was to run a better time than my last race of 26 minutes 36 seconds. To help me along I programmed a specific race song list on my Ipod. I chose six songs for their 'pump up' qualities and made sure their playing times added up to 24 minutes. My plan was to finish the race before the last song ended. I chose Bon Jovi's song It's My Life to push me through to the end.

Conditions for running were perfect. It was cool without any wind. And just as I was strolling to the starting line, Lady Di surprised me by being there to cheer me on. She had gotten the kids to where they were going this morning early so she had time to see me off.

Here I am at the starting line. I'm the one wearing an all black shirt with the determined look of a winner on my face. Or I might just be struggling to adjust the volume on my Ipod.

As the starting gun fired, I started my playlist and Welcome to the Jungle by Guns and Roses shot me out of the gate. My strategy was to run a faster pace for the first mile or as long as my strength held out. After one mile I was feeling a little winded but still pretty good. Then all of the real runners started to pass me. So I chose one of them to shadow and try to keep up with. I kept close to the sixty year old I had chosen until we had to run up the hill. Luckily, this stretch of road was long and straight. So when I reached the top of the hill I could still see the grampa I was following. He was about five blocks ahead of me by now, but if I could still see him, I was keeping up with him. It's too bad that binoculars are too bulky to run with.

So around the mile #2 marker there was a water station. I grabbed a paper cup of water on my way by. I must not be very good at drinking water during a race. I saw many runners grab a cup, get their drink, crush the cup and drop it without changing their pace or stride. I grabbed my cup and had to hold it with two hands before almost dropping it. Then I proceeded to pour half the water up my nose while running diagonally across the road. I ended up sticking my tongue in the water and lapping some up like a dog before dropping the cup half full on the road. In the mean time, I couldn't breathe very well from my nose due to the free nasal rinse so I had to pull a handkerchief from my pocket to clear the area. Since my hands were wet from my drink attempt the hanky pulled out funny and I dropped it on the street as well. I had to stop, turn around and go back to retrieve it. All in all, I don't think the water was worth it on this occasion. When I had finally regained my composure, Olympic Grampa was nowhere to be seen.

So I started in on mile #3 and the last song on my race playlist started. "What! So soon! How am I going to run a 4 minute 36 second mile?", I inwardly yelled. I looked at the timer on my watch and it only said 18 minutes had elapsed. After some mental math I concluded that Itunes doesn't time their songs very accurately. So I decided to run a couple more minutes before kicking it in for the home stretch.

As I hit the last half mile, my knee started to twinge a bit. I know from experience that once this starts, it continues to worsen until I can't run anymore. I then need to rest it by taking a break from running for a few weeks to a couple of months. So I had a decision to make. Do I choose the competitive route and keep pushing through to the finish line in an attempt to improve my time from last year? Or do I slow down and save the knee. Guaranteeing a slower time, but finishing the race and allowing me to continue training for the next race. On the one hand, I would like to have a good time and a break from running wouldn't be the worst thing to happen. But on the other hand, who am I trying to impress with a fast time? I run to improve my health and hopefully add years to my life and quality to those years.

So I asked my conscience, what should I do?

Two miniature gremlins then 'poofed' out of nowhere, one on each of my shoulders, just like in the Tom and Jerry cartoons. In the cartoon, one conscience gremlin was usually an angel and one a devil. Both of mine were angels. On the one shoulder was a tiny Sweet Pea offering her opinion in my ear, "Go for it Dad! I want you to win this race for me! Run as fast as you can and then we can go for ice cream!"

So I turned to the opposite shoulder where Number One Son was asking, "Dad, can I play the Wii?"

My mind was made up. It was now or never. I ain't gonna live forever. I just wanna live while I'm alive. IT'S MY LIFE!

Then I lengthened my stride, pumped my arms and zeroed in on the runner in front of me. I also accidentally broke a little wind at this point for an extra boost. Sorry, dude right behind me.

And just as I shifted into high gear, Holiday by Green Day started playing in my ears. That song was supposed to be in the middle of my race list. Guess who forgot to turn off the shuffle button.

Oh well, that realization gave me new life. I can possibly finish before this song is done. So I ran like the cops were after me. I ran as if I had found a half price buffet. I ran as I would to a Dr Pepper drinking contest and crossed the finish line at 23 minutes and 39 seconds.

Don't worry, the camera always adds 6 seconds.
Then I crawled to the watermelon table.

Now I get to look forward the next race. Two local communities have 5K's in August and Lady Di and I are going to team up and try to get Sweet Pea and Number One Son to join us. I may have to dangle a Wii remote from the back of my shirt to keep N1S motivated though.

For those who are interested, here was my official race playlist. If anyone has suggestions to improve it, let me know and I will learn how to properly operate my Ipod.

1. Welcome to the Jungle-Guns and Roses

2.Holiday-Green Day

3.Cherokee-Europe

4.Rock You Like a Hurricane-Scorpions

5.Peacemaker-Green Day

6.It's My Life-Bon Jovi

If You Want To View Paradise...

2010-06-03T07:56:00.007-06:00

It's hard to believe that it has been over two weeks since the kids performed Willy Wonka Jr. My typing fingers must be getting pretty lazy.

This year Number One Son played the role of Grampa Joe and Sweet Pea was Little Orphan Annie. I know, there is no Annie in the Willy Wonka movie. Well, this production included the Bucket family recklessly splurging on extra electricity to listen to the Little Orphan Annie Radio Show.

This year so many kids auditioned that they had to form three casts. Each cast performed two shows. Lady Di and I were lucky enough to see one show from each of the other casts in addition to our kids' two shows.

Here's Charlie and Grampa Joe singing about their lucky 'Golden Ticket'.

Here they are meeting Mr Wonka at the gate to his factory. It looks like Mr. Wonka could stand to eat some of his own chocolate.
Our Little Orphan Sweet Pea. Do you think she knew where the camera was?

Singing her solo. She was also voted "Best Wig Ever!"

Here's N1S's good friend 'Violet'. She has been in other productions with N1S and has the best voice in the fifth grade. Violet's solo was called 'Chew It' and the songwriters did a good job rhyming to 'chew it'. My favorite line was 'There's no reason to poo poo it'.

Oompa Loompas! Sponsored by Chia Pet.

The candy boat ride with the ghoulish ghouls scaring the naughty children.

N1S's friends Violet and Augustus posing for the 'parentarazzi' following curtain call.

At least they can 'act' like they like each other for the camera.

Every year these shows get better and better. And I can honestly say this show was the best they have done. I'm not just saying that because I'm a parent and I have to say it. The directors do a great job getting over 180 kids to perform to their greatest potential and have so much fun doing it. The best part is the pride the kids have in their hard work. SP and N1S are certainly not shy on stage and definitely not shy about telling you all about their shows. These positive experiences are providing confidence and memories that the kids will have forever.

N1S's upcoming projects include a summer theatre camp production of The Music Man Jr. and possibly a show this fall called 'Show Choir'. In between gigs you can find him spending time with his beloved Wii console.

This summer Sweet Pea will be working hard kicking a soccer ball, basketball camp, girl scouts and a community ed theatre workshop.

Today is the last day of school for the year. How many days until next fall?

Hair today, gone tomorrow.

2010-05-13T15:00:00.019-06:00

Last weekend, we met a crossroads. And this was a big one. Should Sweet Pea get her hair cut?

SP started growing her hair eight short years ago. From day number one she has had fast growing hair. Almost every day of her life has found her with a braid, pony tail, pig tails or a snarly hairstack. Lately, her hair has preferred the snarly hairstack most of the time. Most mornings the hairbrush would hide itself for fear of another 'boot camp workout' through SP's tangled jungle. These hair brush excursions through the brier patch were also not very fun for SP. This was one reason that SP was talking more and more about a new do.

The other reason encouraging her was that a couple years ago her cousin, Spice, with long hair had donated her hair to Locks of Love. SP was all excited about this.

So SP was all ready to chop it off.

I was ready to give up arm cramps from brushing for thirty minutes each morning.

Number One Son was ready to stop listening to SP scream every time I caught a knot in the hair brush.

One member of the household, however, was struggling with SP's decision.

Eight years ago, Lady Di had given birth to a beautiful baby girl. Her beautiful baby girl has had beautiful long tresses for many of those years. Her beautiful hair has held countless pony tail holders, barrettes, hair bands, ribbons, tiaras, combs, flags, flowers, curlers and many other accessories and accoutrement.

This was from one of our many wacky hair days at school.

Over the last eight years, SP's hair has been an important part of her. And Lady Di wasn't sure if she wanted to let her beautiful baby girl go just yet.

But in the end, we finally wore LD down and she made the appointment.

LD and SP took a trip downtown to Rocco Altobelli and made an afternoon of it. SP was very excited and was telling everyone she saw that her hair was going to Locks of Love today. When she sat down in the chair, LD's beautician Michelle, started brushing SP's hair.

"Oh my goodness", she exclaimed. "This hair is to die for!" Then she called all of the other girls in the salon over to show them SP's hair. They all then took turns running their fingers through SP's thick luxurious hair. Commenting on her natural highlights and waves and how perfect it was for Locks of Love. "I think there is enough here for two braids!", her stylist stated.

She braided two twelve inch long cords of SP locks and 'one', 'two' snips and they were gone.

I don't think SP shed a tear, but LD's eyes leaked a little salt water that day.

The stylist did a good job on SP's new short do. Much better than this haircut. And SP was all smiles too.

When she got home she couldn't wait to show everyone. She acted just like the shampoo models on commercials by shaking her head side to side to let her hair fan out. Then she would bend her head back and slowly run her fingers through her now shorter luxurious hair.

In the end, everyone loves SP's new look. We still have our beautiful baby girl. I have had to make one adjustment though. Now when I have to find SP in crowded group of kids, I can no longer find her by looking for the child with the pretty, long hair. I have to look for the slightly more grown up looking, short hair of my still beautiful daughter. The daughter I'm proud of for generously donating one of her prized processions to make life better for someone else's daughter going through a tough time.

For now, we are all enjoying SP's new look, but I know it won't be too long before the hair brush goes on strike again.

Guess what? Answers!

2010-05-09T07:25:00.008-06:00

The results are in. Time to grade your papers. Let's go through the answers to last week's quiz together. Everyone pass your paper to your neighbor to the left and use a red pencil to correct the quiz answers. If you need to refresh your memory of the questions, just scroll to the last post.

The answer to #1 is of course, Chicken Butt.

This was a popular question when I was in school. Chicken Butt was always the smark aleck answer to 'Guess what?' Now I use it to teach the kids not to start every conversation with 'Guess what?' It hasn't worked. In fact, I think I just taught them to be smart alecks as they now purposely say 'Guess what?' just to hear me say Chicken Butt.

The answer to #2 is, Cow Pie.

I don't know where this answer comes from but it just sounds fun.

Lastly, #3's answer is, In Your Hair.

I have heard these three answers to these three questions ever since grade school. Now that everyone knows, please use them liberally.
Questions 4 and 5 were pretty easy. I hope everyone knows Red sky at night, sailor's delight, and How now brown cow.
Questions 6 and 7 may have been a little more difficult. These questions came from one of my college classmates who always quoted these sayings whenever we did some college 'celebrating'. Whiskey to beer, never fear. Beer to whiskey, pretty risky. Both are good rules to follow when overindulgence is to be practiced. However, we usually used them after the fact on the following morning to explain why some friends had worse hangovers than others.
Numbers 8,9 and 10 come straight from the grade school playground. I'm sure everyone knows what to do when you 'Miss me' twice. Now it's time to pucker up. And everyone has threatened to stick a needle in their eye to prove their honesty. But I hadn't heard of #10 until our kids were in school.
The answer to Made ya look, made ya look... is, 'now you're in the baby book!'
I just think this taunt sounds cool.
Of the last two questions, one is old school, one is new school.
Number One Son's first grade class went through a phase where all the kids wanted to make you say the word, 'What'. Once someone said the unutterable word, they had 60 seconds to get someone else to say 'What'. So what happens to you if you don't get rid of the word? Endless mock and ridicule until you use your Dad power to reverse the game into 'Whoever says 'What' wins.
The final question is also a trick to get someone to say 'Underwear'. This trick never gets old. I have played this trick on friends, family, co-workers and strangers at the mall. The joke probably won't work in Victoria's Secret, however, and it might actually get you a visit from mall security.
So you can all heave a sigh of relief, the quiz is over. Please pass your papers back to the right and hand them in. I grade on a curve and am open to bribes of most varieties.
Thank you to all who participated and left comments. Thirteen comments is the most I've ever had for a post. I know a few of the comment were my own but that still counts doesn't it?
Now I will have to gather more questions for the next quiz. Keep your minds as sharp as your number 2 pencils, because you never know when the next pop quiz will be.

Well, what do you know?

2010-04-26T08:58:00.016-06:00

Sometimes my mind wanders here and there and I can never predict where it will end up. Did I say sometimes? Well, this particular mental stroll took me to a place that made me think a midweek quiz would be fun. I'm not talking about a Jeopardy level brain workout. It's more like a, let's see if anyone else thinks of stupid stuff like this, quiz.

Now don't worry. I won't think you are stupid if you ace the quiz. Conversely, missing a question or two will probably land you squarely in the middle of 'normal' intelligence.

Here are twelve questions that I found hiding in the couch cushions of my cranium. Please choose a question and leave your best guess in the comments. I am looking for only one correct answer per question, but being the all powerful quiz judge that I am, I welcome any and all creativity.

I have one last request though. Since this is my quiz, and I know a few of my friends that will easily get all of the questions, I am limiting participants to only one correct answer. Which means, you may leave as many answers to as many questions in the comments as you want, but to make it fun for everyone, you can only answer one question correctly.

That means I need to have a minimum of twelve readers leave at least one comment. Now I don't want this to sound like I'm creating these crazy rules just to boost my comment numbers. That is why I'm doing it, but I don't want it to sound that way. But come on! When you average 2.2 comments per post like me, a rare double digit comment section will send me through the roof.

So spread the word and let's see how many brainy eggheads are out there!

Section 1
1. Guess what! _____ _____.

2.Guess why! _____ ____.

3. Guess where! _____ ___ __.

Section 2
Complete the saying.

4. Red sky at night, _____ ______.

5. How now _____ _____.

6. Whiskey to beer, _____ _____.

7. Beer to whiskey, _____ _____.

Section 3
Complete with a grade schooler's answer.

8. Miss me, miss me, ___ __ ____ ___ __!

9. Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a ____ __ __ __.

10. Made ya look, made ya look, ___ ___ __ ___ ____ ____.

Section 4
Answer these riddles.

11. You have 60 seconds to get rid of what word? ____.

12. What's under there?

That's it. Be sure to stretch out before tackling these mind benders. Next week I'll post the correct answers and maybe even chime in with a few comments of my own. Although, I'm sure twelve very bright people will supply all the answers needed. Right?

I Gotta Feelin' That Tonight's Gonna Be A Good Night

2010-04-10T08:24:00.012-06:00

And this night was definitely a good night! In fact, for the third year in a row, it was a great night. I'm talking about the annual Daddy/Daughter dance. Sweet Pea and I look forward to this every year. SP gets the royal treatment by getting her hair done at our favorite bouffant master. Jeanette outdid herself this year. Somehow, she was able to sculpt, weave and turbo-curl SP's hair to create a work of art again this year.

Here's the before.

Here's the during. I can't believe Jeanette could keep that bunch of tangled Christmas cords straight.
And here's the after. A masterpiece! She even has flowers in her hair to match her dress. Thanks Jeanette for three straight years of beauty. I hope we can book you for next year's dance. And thank you Lady Di for putting the whole ensemble together. Not everyone can match hair to dress to shoes to corsage to tie.

Now I had the challenge to spruce myself up enough to be in SP's league. It wasn't easy, but with Lady Di's help and a matching tie, I was able to clean up enough to qualify to be SP's escort.
We started off the evening by having a fancy family dinner at our favorite restaurant, Applebee's. Even though, Number One Son and Lady Di were woefully under dressed, we still let them stay at our table.

Once SP and I ditched our third and fourth wheels, we sped to the dance. As we were signing in, I could hear the music from the Black Eyed Peas thumping and SP started dancing in the hall before we even entered. Surprisingly, we bypassed the snack table and immediately started to shake our bootys.

But after two or three songs, SP said she was hungry. Never mind that she had just eaten a plate of Applebee's shrimp less than twenty minutes ago. Oh well, what the lady wants, the lady gets.

We dined on Goldfish crackers, M&M's and punch before returning to the dance floor. I couldn't believe how good the DJ was too. It was like he had a copy of my iTunes account. He played all my favorite songs from Miley, Taylor, Beyonce and some guy named Bieber. It was kind of cute when Beyonce's song 'Single Lady' was played, because there were about a hundred plus single ladies dancing with their dads.

We also had the requisite YMCA, Hokey Pokey and the Chicken Dance. The DJ even slipped in some Michael Jackson. Thriller, Beat It and Billie Jean. My moonwalk muscle was very sore the next morning.

I think this was during the 'Put your head in' verse.

The evening ended with a raffle for various toys which, once again, we didn't win.

Even so, it didn't damper our evening. SP got to twirl her dress a lot and squeal with many of her girlfriends. I got to jump around with my daughter and act like Prince Charming. I can't wait for next year.

A Juggling Act

2010-04-03T09:18:00.007-06:00

An interesting development has surfaced recently and I'm not quite sure how to interpret it.

As most of you know, Number One Son and Sweet Pea both were rewarded with parts in the upcoming children's theatre production of Willy Wonka Jr. This means they both get to practice every week with kids they don't normally hang out with.

In N1S's case, with his experience in past plays, he has formed a few really good friendships and looks forward to renewing them every time they get together for a performance.

Many of you also know that N1S's Asperger's has required him to work very hard at making friends. Asperger people take things very literally and have to learn many interpersonal skills in order to not annoy people. Non-verbal cues that we recognize naturally, like eye rolling, sarcasm and subtle facial expressions, need to be taught to a person with Asperger's. Even with instruction and practice, many Asperger's people only maintain a few good friendships at a time. In many cases, it's just too much work to have to decipher social cues from a large group of friends. More often than not, Asperger's kids are usually not in the 'most popular' group.

Which leads us to our interesting development. As I said before, play practice has started which allows N1S to renew some old acquaintances. One friend he has from past performances is a girl three years his senior. "G1" is very outgoing and greets everyone with a loud hug. N1S seems to be her favorite though and always goes out of her way to say hello or goodbye. Three performances ago, he informed us that G1 was his girlfriend.

His second close theater friend is "G2". She has shared the spotlight with him for three productions and is cute as a button with a great singing voice. Well, apparently, at the last practice, N1S was passing notes back and forth with G2. Lady Di and I instantly grew rabbit ears and tuned in to N1S's story.

LD asked first, "Where are the notes?". She wanted to gather the evidence.

"G2 has it. We just passed the same piece of paper back and forth. Like texting, only with paper.", he very accurately answered.

"Well, what did you guys write?", I inquired, trying not to sound too eager, or too calm, or too get-on-with-the-details, boy!

"She wrote that she would like me for a boyfriend and I answered that I would want her for a girlfriend.", was his matter of fact answer. I think LD and I sucked all of the air from the room with our gasps. I am so glad he is still at an age where he tells us everything. N1S, however, thought it was no big deal. Like having girls fawning all over him is a daily occurance.

After that he asked me if he was too young for a girlfriend. I made myself pause for a second before non-chalantly telling him that he probably was too young, but they could still hang out. What I wanted to say was, "Are you kidding? You're eleven! You can't have a girlfriend for thirteen more years!"

We got another jolt a few days later when G2 invited N1S to the movies with her. LD could barely hold the phone in her shaking hand until G2's parents got on the line and said the whole family would like him to come. Knowing that Mom, Dad and G2's little brother were going too, calmed us down considerably.

All kidding aside, LD and I weren't really that worked up. We know N1S and G2 are good friends we're just going to continue to let them be good friends.

But the next day we did get worked up. N1S got a phone call at home from yet another girl from school, "G3". G3 left a couple of messages telling N1S to call her back because she was waiting for him to call and too hurry up with it. LD and I know absolutely nothing about G3. But N1S sure knows about her. We found out she is in N1S's social studies class and he even wrote her phone number in his planner.

I'm starting to think that maybe all those 'social friendship exercises' N1S has worked at over the years were just code words for 'How to be a Fonzie' classes. I wish I could say that I have some pointers for him about girls when the time comes, but juggling three girlfriends at a time is way out of my league. I'm going to have to find a Happy Days DVD collection to get caught up. Lesson number one, buy leather jacket.

Luck of the Sweet Peas

2010-03-17T15:07:00.035-06:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day! I hope no one got pinched today. I know we all had our green on. There have been many years where I have forgotten to wear green and I received my share of pinches. But Sweet Pea wasn't going to let me forget this year.

When I picked SP and her friend, 'J',up after school, they were both chattering about the Leprechaun trap set up in SP's friend's class. From what I could eavesdrop, her class decorated a box and placed various Leprechaun treats inside. I asked, 'J', what kind of treats do Leprechauns like?

She said, "I don't remember. Pretzels I think."

I then inquired as to what they were going to do with their Leprechaun if they actually caught one.

"We're going to keep him in the empty fish tank and look at him.", she answered.

That sounds like a lot of fun for the Leprechaun.

That night, SP's creative energy was buzzing. When bedtime rolled around, she had her own Leprechaun trap all ready to spring in her bedroom. On the floor at the foot of her bed, SP had brought up her indoor tent to sleep in and be ready for any Leprechaun action. Firstly, she made a trail of homemade paper money, coins and bills.

The Whoopee Cushion was at the start of the money trail, right next to her pillow, and acted as the 'alarm' to wake SP in the night so she could exit her tent and watch the Leprechaun greedily follow his trail to entrapment.

She then rigged her waste basket with string.

Next she ran the string across her bed and anchored it to her book baskets. Her horse 'Paint', her lamb and her dolphin all pitched in.
The final 'bait' was a half box decorated with a picture of 'Leanie (pronounced Lennie) The Leprechaun', with a half empty box of Jolly Rancher Chews and an acorn from who knows how many summers past. This was where SP, after her Whoopee Cushion wake up, would pull the string and drop the waste basket on her unlucky prey.

When Lady Di saw the energy and excitement that SP was putting into her creation, she just had to put her Keep-Your-Room-Clean Mom sense away for the night.

Before going to bed, I asked SP the same question that I asked her friend. "What will you do if you really catch one?"

"I will probably just talk to him a little and then set him free.", she said.

Sounds like a catch and release program.

In the morning, before SP awoke, Lady Di snuck into her room and place a St. Patrick's Day scarf under the waste basket and stepped on the Whoopee Cushion as she stealthily slipped out of the room while SP was still groggy.

SP came running into our room with wild eyes to show us what she had trapped. "I told you they're real!", she shouted. "You didn't believe, Dad didn't believe and Number One Son didn't believe! But I knew all along."

So she got to wear a really cool scarf to school that all her friends oooh'd and aaah'd over when she told them the story.

I think Leanie followed her home from school to take his scarf back.

Happy Green Day!

Blast Off!

2010-03-05T16:57:00.014-06:00

Last week, Number One Son's school had a dress up week to break the winter doldrums. They hosted PJ's Day, Hawaii Day, Career Day and a couple others I don't remember. Both kids have these mini celebrations every year. They always happen in the winter too. Forcing the kids to wear hula skirts, pj's or any other warm weather clothing in the middle of the coldest part of the winter. I also have had enough of mismatched clothes day. The reason for this is that wacky hair day seems to always tag along. And Sweet Pea's hair adds a good hour and a half sculpting time in the morning on that day. This picture is from either last year or two years ago.

But this dress up week was just like any other except for two things that made it special. Firstly, since N1S is in fifth grade, this might be one of his last mid-winter themed weeks before he becomes 'too cool' to participate. The second memorable aspect is N1S's choice for Career Day. He chose to go to school as a pharmacist, just like his dad. As a dad, the most important duty I have is to guide our children to be safe, confident and prepared for life on their own. It was so heartwarming to know that N1S thought enough of his dad to want to follow in his footsteps. I would certainly be proud if either or both of our kids decided on a career in the medical field.

But I know N1S. And I know that pharmacy isn't really his 'first favorite' choice.

I prodded, "Are you sure their isn't another career that you would like to be tomorrow?"

"Well, I really would like to be a rocket scientist.", he confessed.

"Even better", I thought. And the costume is almost the same as a pharmacist.

I borrowed N1S a white smock and Lady Di, who always has the best ideas, accessorized.

Here he is contemplating thrust, trajectory and Klingons.

Lady Di even created an official NASA identity badge.

Wearing a tie was N1S's idea. I helped him tie it that morning before going to work. He said, "Just like Dad.", which made it very hard not to hug him just then. So I did.

I picked him up after school and he seemed to be in a sour mood. I asked him how school was. He said, "I don't want to talk about."

"Is everything OK?", I questioned. I could tell he was fighting back tears.

"I spilled tacos on your white coat.", he whispered.

"Just like Dad.", I reassured.

What's New?

2010-02-27T08:00:00.007-06:00

Big news this week! First of all, the kids got exciting news from the director of Willy Wonka Jr., this year's musical. Sweet Pea made the cut and will be an orphan girl named Annie. This will be SP's second play and her first role with a speaking part. Her director said that she will get to say 'Leapin' Lizards!' multiple times. Which begs the question, "Which play are they actually doing?" It sounds an awful lot like Annie. I guess we will see in May when the performance is scheduled.

Number One Son also got a call from the director informing him that he will play the role of Grampa Joe. At least that's a name I recognize from the movie. Needless to say, he was quite excited to get the part he was hoping for. Lady Di and I were just glad each kid got any part. Even though there were three casts with sixty roles per cast, over ninety kids had to be turned away. Which speaks very highly of the popularity of our local children's theatre program.

That was our first good news of the week. The second news we got was a call from school. This week they informed us that N1S had been nominated for student of the month. This is the first time this has ever happened and we couldn't be prouder. Wednesday morning we were invited to the middle school cafeteria for a Student of the Month breakfast before classes. We dined on cinnamon rolls and cartons of milk with about a dozen other nominated kids and their families. The teachers then presented each student with a laminated certificate and a laminated picture of the student which will go on the bulletin board at school. They also put together a short slide show for each student on the big screen. Lady Di had submitted some of her favorite photos of N1S for the slide show. Too bad the school used this one instead. It's a nice enough picture but it looks like his hair had stocking cap static just before the flash went off. I guess you have to expect haystack hair in a Minnesota winter. With hair like that he won't have to do much styling to match Grampa Joe's hair. Or even Annie's hair for that matter. Oh well, since his hair looks like this ninety percent of the time anyway, at least the kids in school will recognize him on the bulletin board.

After N1S had received his congratulations from the teachers he came back to sit with us and show off his laminates. Lady Di shuffled through the papers looking for the item she had been anxiously waiting for. Then she found her golden ticket. The Student of the Month bumper sticker. She was so excited to now be able to drive a van with a bumper sticker stating, 'Proud parent of a Student of the Month'. Now we can finally cover up the 'Honk If You're ..... , (Author's comment deleted due to severe spousal embarrassment).

We finished up the week on yet another high note. Saturday afternoon found Sweet Pea and myself at the Girl Scout Pinewood Derby. This is our second year of racing and instead of striving for speed, we opted for design.

SP designed her Spongebob bathtub car from the color to the shower curtain. I shaped her block of wood a little bit and attached her wheels but SP completed everything else. And her hard work paid off. Out of 126 entries, her car was voted 'Funniest Car'.Her car beat out a 'brownie, birthday cake, crayola box, roller skate, piano and a host of very creative cars. She was so excited to get her 'first' real trophy. She made me promise not to tell Lady Di until we got home so she could surprise her.

So as you can see, we're just a house full of winners this week aren't we? Well, I guess I didn't technically 'win' anything. The kids did all of the winning this week. But when the kids win, Lady Di and I feel like even bigger winners.

Where's The Lifetime Supply Of Chocolate?

2010-02-19T07:19:00.002-06:00

Last Tuesday, the kids had auditions for the upcoming community children's theatre musical, Willy Wonka Jr. This is Sweet Pea's second try out and Number One Son is trying to land his fifth role. This was also the first time that I was able to attend the auditions, luckily having the night off from work.

Auditions are pretty simple in that the kids get on stage in front of the directors in groups of five and sing a verse from a favorite song to show where their voice range fits, and recite a few lines from the play to gauge their expressiveness. Three years ago when N1S tried out for Kokonut Kapers as a second grader, he sang Jingle Bells and got a role as a dancing pirate. Even way back then, Lady Di noticed how comfortable he was on stage. For some reason, he doesn't get nervous at all while performing.

Our kids were about the sixth group to audition. I didn't know how excited they were until their names were called. I leaned over to offer some last minute encouragement only to find two empty seats and a small whirl of dust. They ran up on stage and N1S got a small whoop from a few of his friends which he answered with a 'rock-n-roll' hand sign. Did I mention how comfortable he is on stage?
SP sang 'You're A Mean One Mr. Grinch' complete with her own original choreography. N1S sang 'Benjamin Calypso' from Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat musical. They each read a few lines from the play and were done. I'm glad we got there early and were done early because I heard auditions went pretty late into the evening.

That night you could sense quite a bit of nervousness from some of the kids. I guess I would have been nervous too since the auditorium was full of kids and parents watching all of the auditions. This year's production has two casts of sixty roles each. On the first night of two audition nights, over one hundred and eighty kids tried out. The unfortunate thing for Sweet Pea is that about one hundred and sixty five of them were girls. She has much more competition than her brother. It's really too bad that more boys don't get involved with theatre as much. Our kids have had a blast with it! They learn music, dancing, teamwork, discipline (it can't be easy keeping 60 kids quiet back stage) all while having fun.

One of SP's friends was all ready to try out until he heard that he had to sing a song on stage. N1S also has a friend from church that said he was excited to try out this year. Unfortunately, on Ash Wednesday we found out that he had changed his mind also. His mother told us that he too was intimidated by singing a song in front of people. He said, "Singing? Nope, I'm not singing on stage." His mother then asked him, "You did read it was a musical, didn't you?" She then confided to us that she thinks her son only heard the word 'chocolate' and figured that would be the extent of his involvement with the Willy Wonka Jr. production. I hope that both boys attend this years play and change their minds for next year.
We are really lucky to have such a strong children's theatre program. This year they had to limit auditions to only our local school district and the turn out was still overwhelming.

We will find out next week whether the kids get a role in one of the casts or not. With that much competition for roles I'm guessing that there will a lot of Oompa Loompas on stage.

As a side note, I mentioned that we talked to N1S's friend on Ash Wednesday. Two years ago SP was nervous about going to service because she thought the ashes were going to hurt. This year she had no such worries. In fact, when people were lining up to receive their ashes, SP noticed some people lifting up their bangs to expose their foreheads. I then noticed SP immediately pull her headband out of her hair and comb some of her bangs down. She was deliberately messing up her hair just so she could lift her bangs for Pastor. When I told her to put her headband back in she complained that it hurt her behind her ears. I guess it only hurts on Ash Wednesday, because she wears one to school every day with no complaints. She reluctantly replaced her headband and we all received our ashes.

Don't worry, our pastor didn't get overzealous with the ashes. This is SP from last year's production of 'Alms For The Poor'.

Did You Know...?

2010-02-14T07:00:00.014-06:00

This week I've been perusing a book that Number One Son received for Christmas this year. It's a book called 1001 Cool Freaky Facts. This type of book is right up N1S's alley. He loves reading and memorizing facts. A few years ago he was into Presidential trivia. Did you know that George Washington died in 1799? Or was he born in 1799? Or maybe he had 99 kids. I can't remember which. I really need to listen to N1S more.

Then N1S switched to 'Crazy Laws' trivia for a while. That's when we heard all about some state that would throw you in jail if you told an Ole and Lena joke to a skunk on Sunday.

And almost since birth, N1S has been spitting up geysers of Star Wars minutiae.

So last week, I was sitting in the living room trying to find something on TV. Since NBC gave Conan the axe, I have been left with nothing to entertain me. So I picked up N1S's 'Freaky' book and idly paged through. As they say, 'The acorn doesn't fall far from the tree'. I got pulled in and trapped by this book. I could feel my brain growing stronger with each page. Did you know that diamonds are flammable? It's under fact #697. I also found out that Donald Duck's middle name is Fauntleroy. (#489) And Barbie's full name is Barbara Millicent Roberts.(#466) Butterflies taste with their feet (#96) and robots in Japan pay union dues.(#950)

My favorite section of the book was about words and languages. I learned that Zorro is Spanish for fox.(#814) and the dot over the letter 'i' is called the tittle. There are also no words in the English language that rhyme with the words 'month, silver, orange and purple'.(#802) And we all have Dr Suess to thank for inventing the word, 'nerd'.(#812)

So we now have two active information geysers in the house. When N1S takes a fact break for school or bedtime, I'm right there to take over for him, much to the enjoyment of Lady Di.

And speaking of Lady Di just reminded me that I haven't written my Valentine's Day poem to her yet.

Ode to Lady Di-2010

I practiced and practiced every month,
but won the lisp-contest only oneth.

The prize I received was a grill colored silver
So I threw on some steaks. What else is a grill fer?

I guess silver is better by far than orange
but Sweet Pea said my poem so far is bor-inge!

You need to spice it up now, add some Va-Voem!
So I copied a line from my Father-in-law's poem.

Roses are red, violets are purple
I love Lady Di more than maple syrple.

With my ode concluded. It is now time to go.
Just remember LD, you're still a 'Zorro'.

Happy Valentine's Day, Honey.

And remember, candles burn better when they are frozen(#121) and apples are members of the rose family.(#308) So don't tell Lady Di about my surprise romantic dinner outside in the snow with a lovely arrangement of a dozen apples. Yellow ones, of course. Her favorite.

Old Man Runner

2010-02-11T07:00:00.004-06:00

For the last six months, I have tried running to keep in shape. When I reached the big 4-0 earlier this year, I was forced to face some facts. Number one is, I am no longer an athlete. Oh I used to be one, around twenty five years ago. From ages 14 to 18 I could be found competing in year round sports. Football in the fall, basketball in the winter, track in the spring and baseball in the summer. In all of those seasons I loved to compete. But I hated practicing. More specifically, I hated running.

So why did I quit participating in these activities once I graduated? They're just too much work. Does that make me lazy? Of course it does. I just kept thinking, I'm an athlete. I can always start up again whenever I want to. All I would have to do is a few stretches and pick up right where I left off.

Well, at 40 years old, I found out that I am much stiffer than I remember from twenty years ago. My joints don't loosen up as quickly or as completely as before. I quickly realized that an athlete I am no more.

So back to the present and why I decided that now was the time start exercising. Lady Di had much to do with my motivation. She has been running, walking and exercising for the last few years. She also works out with an Ipod. That was the final incentive to get me off my butt and into my ten year old sneakers.

Ipods are just too cool. Twenty plus years ago I had tried running with a radio, but growing up in South Dakota you quickly learn that if you don't listen to country music, your radio choices are limited. I also tried the ultra cool Sony Walkman. Then I could choose my own music as long as I listened to every song in order and stopped halfway to flip the cassette. My Walkman was also always trying to pull my running shorts down when clipped to my waistband. The only other choice I had for running music back then was singing to myself in cadence with my stride. But who wants to run to a marching, wheezing, out of breath Bon Jovi song?

So Lady Di's Ipod was a new toy for me to tryout. Her Ipod has a list of 80's music and once I figured out how to work it, I took off running. It was amazing how pumped up I was just jamming to the first Gun's and Roses song. Half way through the song, however, my body started to complain that the novelty of running for fun had left. My lungs wheezed, my heart pounded and my legs screamed. But the music kept me going. I stopped multiple times to walk but was still able to make it back home. The whole run/walk round trip took 18 minutes. And my head was thumping from my overworked heart for 17 of those minutes.

Well since then, I have gotten my own Ipod because Lady Di was tired of sponging my perspiration from hers. My Ipod is loaded with Sinatra, Oingo Boingo and 80's songs. It was this Ipod that has kept me running. This type of running is so much different than the running I did as a teen. As a teen, I ran to exhaustion to get faster and stronger. Now I can enjoy nature and work muscles that don't get as much use during the day. Listening to music also allows me to pretend I'm in a music video. For some reason I think it would be cool to film Billie Joe Armstrong jogging the entire song of Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Or I can listen to St. Elmo's Fire and envision myself in an 80's movie, running to meet Lady Di at the bus station before she gets on and I lose her forever.

Anyway, whatever the reason is for running, I am starting to feel better. I am running longer and don't feel as terrible after a run. On the contrary, I am actually starting to feel better after a run and can notice myself feeling worse when I don't run. I have competed in two 5K races and am looking forward to this summer to see if I can lower my time. I will never get the body of the athlete I used to be, but in my mind, I still am an athlete. I wasn't able to pick up where I left off, but at least I am moving in the right direction. I became an athlete once. I can become one again.

Thank you Apple, Inc.

I Wanna Be A Canadian Idiot

2010-02-04T07:25:00.004-06:00

The Winter Olympics are fast approaching. Everyone get ready to be suddenly caught up in all the excitement of cheering on athletes you have never heard of, in sports that you never cared for before. I know that sounds negative, but I truly love the Olympics, Summer and Winter.

So why is it that in any other non-Olympic year, I have no interest at all in Olympic sports? With all of the sports channel options on television I have no trouble finding athletes competing in track and field, gymnastics, skiing, skating, etc. all through the year. Why don't I care? Sure it's fun to watch these sports once in a while, but I'm not keeping stats in a fantasy bobsled league or collecting cross country skier cards.

I think there may be two reasons that the Olympics are different. The first reason is that since each of the Olympics happens only every four years, I feel a sense of anticipation and importance for something that I can't experience everyday. I'm sure the Olympics would lose some of it's luster if it occurred every year and if it did then I would probably only watch the Olympics for the commercials. I think this is the reason that Olympic hockey doesn't interest me much either. The same goes for Olympic basketball and baseball in the summer. I can watch those sports pretty much year round every year and don't need any more.

Reason number two is that the Olympic news coverage goes out of it's way to find the personal stories of the athletes. The type of stories that illustrate overcoming obstacles, striving for greatness and incredibly hard work over many years all for one brief shining moment on the medals podium.

Or maybe it's possible that I can only stand about ten days worth of these less popular sports every four years. Whatever the reason, the fact remains that for a couple of weeks I will be eagerly following all of the cold weather action.

Four years ago, I got caught up following the US curling team. I initially watched them because they were from Bemidji, MN and because Lady Di had dined at the curling team captain's pizza restaurant back in college. I watched just about every match they had. I learned the rules and scoring to curling and found myself shouting advice at my TV to help the team. (Sweep faster!) Now with the next Winter Olympics only days away, I couldn't tell you if curling actually involves hair curlers or not.

But here I go again, getting all excited for the Vancouver Games. Lady Di shares my enthusiasm, but for some reason she is only interested in speed skating. I like speed skating too, but I will also try to squeeze in some ski jump, bobsled, downhill skiing and snowboarding.

The Flying Tomato!

U-S-A! U-S-A!

Our Time Machine

2010-01-28T08:00:00.011-06:00

Our frigid winter just got a little warmer. Although the temps have risen a little bit this week, I'm not talking about the thermometer.

We are enjoying warm memories from a blast from the past in the form of a 1912 phonograph.

We received this antique Edison disc phonograph from Lady Di's Grandma Ollie a few years ago. We finally took it in for repairs last fall and just brought it home this winter. It works great. It still has that dusty antique store smell too.

For its debut, the kids weren't sure what to expect. "Will it sound like a CD?", they asked.

"Not quite.", I answered.

They were still excited to watch it in action. They both thought it might be loud judging by its size, so they held their ears in anticipation.

I slowly turned the crank to wind it up. I set the record spinning and placed the needle. A very scratchy, but quite musical, march played. Both kids thought it was pretty cool. Number One Son, of course, was full of questions.

"What is that scratchy sound?"

"How does it work?"

"How old is it?"

"Do we have any Green Day records?" No, but we do have "When the Harvest Moon Shines" and "The President Harding March".

"Who is President Harding?"

"Some dude from ancient times.", I answered with Dad-authority.

When we picked up the phonograph we also bought a box of random records for $5. We haven't made it through the whole box yet. Unfortunately, our Edison only plays records from before WWII. These discs are quite thick and tough. If we were to play a newer LP on our player, the needle (which is closer to a small nail than an actual needle) would probably cut the disc into spiral fries. It's also interesting that each disc tells what kind of song it plays. Along with the song title, it tells you if it is a Fox Trot, Two Step, March or Break Dancing record. So after the first few songs, the kids wanted to go to the next step.

"Can I turn the crank?" "I want to put the needle on the record!"

As the kids cranked, I explained that this was how Grandma Ollie and Grandma Peg listened to music when they were young.

Once they each had had a turn to run the hardware, the novelty started to wane. "That's nice Dad, but I'm going to watch iCarly now."

Lady Di and I stayed in the den for a few more songs. We still have some shining up to do and a little fabric repair for the front grill. But other than that, we have a fine new piece of antique furniture added to our music room.

Fishing and Football and Cookies.

2010-01-21T20:40:00.003-06:00

Last weekend we finally found some time to celebrate our last Christmas of the season with Lady Di's parents in northern Minnesota. And the weather surprisingly cooperated completely. We actually had warmer weather there than at our home five hours south.

But don't worry, it still was cold enough to keep the lakes hard enough to fish on. In case you forgot, these are the 'fishing grandparents'.

We arrived late on Friday, so all we had time for was exchanging belated Christmas gifts. Well, actually we also had time to snack on Christmas cookies and a few other sweets Grandma just happened to have out. Grandma complained that she was just sick and tired of looking at Christmas cookies, so I made sure to help her out in any way I could.

On Saturday morning, we all woke up bright and early. Even though I woke up the least early, I was still in time for pancakes and ham. Thanks Lady Di.

With our bellies full, the kids and I rode the four wheeler down to the lake for some ice fishing. Uncle Greg had his fish house all set up and ready on Grandpa's lake. His fish house had two holes, a chair and a bucket. Number One Son got the chair. Sweet Pea sat on the bucket. And I stood. I stood mostly outside since the weather was so nice and the fish house ceiling was so low. The fish didn't cooperate much that morning and N1S walked back to the house after an hour or so. SP was a little more determined, sticking it out for another hour before succumbing to boredom.

Saturday night, we visited Uncle Greg who lives just up the road from Grandma and Grandpa. He has two big dogs and a kitty which SP did most of her visiting with. But when she took a break from the animals, she had business on her mind. SP just happened to bring along her Girl Scout Cookie Order sheet. She then turned on the 'sweet niece' act and proceeded to take Uncle Greg to the cleaners. First, SP took down Uncle Greg's order for a couple boxes of Thin Mints. Then she took her order sheet to Uncle Greg's girlfriend who added a few of her favorites to the list. Then SP returned to Greg to show him some choices he might have missed. By the end of the evening, SP had inked 13 boxes to her Uncle Greg's column. I'd say that was a successful sales call. I'm not sure, but I think SP even sold a couple boxes to Greg's dogs.

On Sunday morning, we had just enough time to squeeze in some more fishing before the Vikings football game. N1S decided that he preferred virtual fishing on the computer to the actual thing, so SP and I were on our own. At least this time I had a place to sit in the fish house. Our luck picked up just where it left off the previous day without even a nibble. But that's why it's called 'fishing' and not 'catching'. But the peace and solitude of the fish house offered the opportunity for Dad and Daughter to have some time to discuss the important issues of the day. We talked about fishing. We talked about the upcoming children's play auditions and which songs she would like to sing. (She decided on "Your a Mean One, Mr. Grinch") SP also expressed her concern about her brother playing too rough when she asks him to play Barbies with her. Apparently, his idea of Barbie play involves more crashing and falling than SP is comfortable with.

After a half hour of pleasant discussion, our conversation was interrupted by a few nibbles on our lines. We lost our bait! This was a good sign. It wasn't too long after rebaiting that SP got her first strike. She reeled in a small perch. Now we were excited. As I was getting her perch off her hook, my rod started bouncing. I couldn't get to my rod before my fish spit out my hook. I'm sure it was a huge one that got away. After that excitement, the fishing action settled down again to just a few nibbles here and there.

Then SP got the big one! She started reeling like a champion pencil sharpener on Red Bull. She excitedly stated, "Ohhh, this is a big one!" And I could tell it must have been big because her catch was taking line out as fast as SP could reel it. I finally had to grab her line and pull the fish to the ice hole. SP let out a startled yip when her four pound northern poked it's pointy lips though the hole. Her line broke just as her fish filled the hole but he was too big to go back down. So I grabbed all 24 inches of fish out of the hole for SP to admire. We measured and then SP was ready for the fish to return to the lake. She likes to fish, but doesn't want to get too close to the fish.

After that you would think SP would want to continue fishing, but she was starting to get hungry so we went in.

That was OK with me because it was getting close to game time anyway. I got to watch the first half of the Viking's drubbing of the Cowboys before we had to say good bye and start the long drive home.

So our Christmas celebrating has finally come to a close. Christmas is always better late than never. And always better if celebrated three times than once. And if anyone is looking to buy some Girl Scout cookies this year, SP is still taking orders.

If I Had a Million Dollars

2010-01-07T21:46:00.038-06:00

I'm sure everyone has done this at one time or another. Asking yourself, "What would I do if I won the lottery?"

These are my thoughts on the matter.

First of all, I would probably keep working. Not! The minute I find out I'm a winner, I'm hiring someone to work my two week notice for me. I'll be too busy spending anyway.

Now here is what my 'new occupation' will be purchasing.

I'll first mention all of the obvious purchases. Of course, I'll have to buy everyone in my family a house and a few vacation houses for us and the kids. I'll donate to Autism research, Special Olympics and the Ronald McDonald House. I'll also make sure my church has electric seat warmers and massagers installed in the pews. I might even follow through on a pledge to Public Television.

With the important stuff out of the way, here is my list of necessities brought about by my sudden windfall.

First of all, since I quit my job, I will need something to do. It may sound crazy but I would love to sit on a riding mower and listen to my Ipod. If I can get a job like Forrest Gump and mow the football field all summer, I would be in heaven. Other acceptable jobs would be Sinatra impersonator or flannel tester.

But I would also need something to waste my time in the winter. This is where my new game room would come in. It would have wall to wall video games from the 1980's. Pac Man, Frogger and anything from the Atari line. It would basically be an adult Chuck-e-Cheese with a pool table in the middle. And since I would be too busy in the game room to shovel the driveway in the winter, I would need a heated driveway. And not just warm enough to melt snow, but hot enough to get out the lawn chairs and sweat at our own driveway beach party in the middle of February. I think I would also have to hire a professional Christmas lights putter-upper.

And while were at it, I have a few more home improvements that would need to be done. Every sink in the house would have to be fitted with three knobs instead of just two. One for hot, one for cold, and one for Dr. Pepper. Better yet, each sink will have a Dr. Pepper spray nozzle in case a cup is unavailable. I want to be able to satisfy any Dr. Pepper desire at any time, anywhere in the house. That includes the shower. I would also need a full sized popcorn cart in every room with a popcorn attendant to sort out all of the old maids.

My favorite room in the house, however, would be the 'library'. A room with dark wood and shelves and shelves of books. Of course, they would have to be bound in 'genuine imitation leather'. And, of course, the library would have a Dr. Pepper fountain as it's centerpiece. Besides books and fountains, my library will have one big cushy chair next to a small table and lamp for reading. And I suppose since I would have this hoity toity library, I would have to start doing hoity toity things like pipe smoking, smoking-jacket wearing and brandy snifting. Although, my brandy snifter would probably contain a liquid curiously resembling a certain sugary carbonated beverage.

I'm sure if I ever did win the lottery, I would think up lots of other future necessities like a robot butler and personal food chewer. But I'll want to remain down-to-earth and only use the food chewer for really, really chewy foods.

So, someday, if your pharmacy is unexpectedly closed on the same day that Dr. Pepper stock goes through the roof, you'll know who has a golden ticket.

Post Christmas Report

2009-12-27T21:49:00.029-06:00

I hope everyone had an enjoyable Christmas. Like many of our friends and family, we were snowed in for Christmas. We had planned to visit my folks in SD but Jack Frost decided to show off and drop around ten inches of snow last weekend. It made our pine trees look as if they had multi colored cotton candy on their branches as the Christmas lights shown through.

It also turned our porch roof into a carnival stage as each bulb melted its way through the snow.

As it was, we still had a nice family Christmas. Since we were home, we were able to attend Christmas Eve church service. The kids really look forward to this because they get to hold a lit candle and sing Silent Night. By now the kids can recite the candle rules by heart. Never tip a lit candle! We've never had a candle mishap, but I can still remember an event from my childhood involving open flames in church. I was probably ten years old or so and I was diligently holding my lit candle. I only flinched a little bit when the hot wax dripped on my finger. However, just a few people down the pew sat a friend of mine holding his candle. He was a couple years older than me so I'm sure he was ready for a little hot wax. One thing he forgot however, was to hold the candle a little bit away from his body. Because when it was time to pray, he bowed his head, dipping his bangs into his flame. It only took a quick forehead slap to put out, but the burnt hair smell provided a good after church story for him.

After church, we headed home to harvest the gifts that had sprouted under our Christmas tree for the last few weeks.

The kids each got a pair of ski goggles with a camera included. So that meant they each had to wear their goggles to open the rest of their gifts.

Once that was done, it didn't take too much convincing to get ready for bed. Sweet Pea however required some pre-Christmas preparation before bed. For some reason, she got it into her head that she needed curls in her hair for Christmas morning. So we found a dozen curlers and Lady Di obliged.
SP also had to sleep on the floor under the blanket tent she rigged up with her dresser and window. I guess a special night needs special sleeping arrangements.

And here is the result in the morning.

We then went outside to play in the snow and all of the curls disappeared.

Since the snow kept us home, it also kept a number of people in town home bound. So we ended up enjoying our turkey and mashed potatoes with another neighbor family. We ate, played games and watched the kids play Mario Kart.

After our company left we realized that no one had inquired into their Christmas stocking yet. Santa was right on the mark this year. Each child received a Wii game. SP got Littlest Pet Shop and Number One Son received Star Wars Force Unleashed, his first teen-rated game. We draw the line at games with blood, shooting and killing. This game has fighting and a lot of lightsaber slashing, but it seems quite tame compared to the violent games some of N1S's friends talk about.

All in all, we had a great Christmas even if our travel plans fell through. One positive result of the blizzard was the return of our annual snow hill. Every year our favorite plower (Ronnie) piles all of the snow from the cul-de-sac next to our driveway.

This year we have the tallest pile he has ever made. When we play king of this mountain we really want to stay king. I found out that grown ups seem to fall a little harder down this hill than in years past.

Hopefully, the snow will take a break from falling now. I'm tired of clearing the driveway twice daily. A little sunshine, even if it's cold sunshine, would be welcome.

O Tannenbaum

2009-12-18T08:39:00.002-06:00

For the last two years I have posted pictures of our Christmas trees. When Lady Di and I were first married, our goal was to have a different Christmas tree in each room of our future home. At one time we peaked at five Christmas trees. But for the last few years we have scaled back a bit. Our tree total has shrunk to four. But we only decorate three of them, as one tree sits outside on our porch.

Last week, the last ornament was placed on the last tree. So, for your enjoyment, is our third annual Christmas tree revue.

Once again, this is our 'fancy tree'. Or as Sweet Pea calls it, 'The grown-up tree'. Not much new to it. It is still gold and burgundy with white lights. I took the picture from the floor to make it look twelve feet tall.

Next is the Grandma tree. We received this tree from my Grandma Bernice and it is decorated with white angels and homemade ornaments from Lady Di's Grandma Ollie. It sits upstairs and shines out the front window acting as a Christmas beacon to all who travel through our cul-de-sac. It also acts as a nice night light when I have to descend the stairs in the middle of the night to let the dog out.

Thirdly, is the kid tree. This tree catches all of the homemade, cartoon and colorful ornaments. Since the kids are now tall enough to reach past the bottom half of the tree, we let them decorate it. This tree gets new ornaments added to it every year, so it's starting to look a little full.

This year, SP thought all of our Star Trek guys needed to be together but made sure that Yoda and Darth Vader were on opposite sides of the tree.

Here's our little elf making sure everything is Christmasy.

This is a quick picture of our outside Christmas cheer. It's about the same as last year. Red, white and green lights with a new tree on the porch. We also decorate eight trees in the back yard but I just can't get a usable picture of them. Our recent snowfall has really given the trees a colorful glow.

It's hard to believe that Christmas is only one week away. We usually leave the decorations up until New Year's Day. So it's only two more weeks until the dreaded basement relay to find all the boxes to match their ornaments.

March of the Bumbles.

2009-12-13T08:45:00.006-06:00

Tonight we honored the age old tradition of watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer as a family. Like many, I have watched this show religiously for the last thirty-five years or so. That was way back in the day when it was almost new. Back then, we had to make sure we read the TV guide each week so we wouldn't miss it. Because it was only on once a year and it was just too much of a bother to get out of a chair to surf the other three channels we had.

But here we are now, forty years in the future. We haven't gotten our hover cars yet. And we don't eat our seven course meals in a capsule. But we can enjoy the luxury of watching a DVD of Rudolph whenever we want.

So tonight we popped in our DVD and sipped hot cocoa with marshmallows courtesy of Lady Di.

Our kids of eleven and seven years old, have also viewed this Christmas classic multiple times. Enough times, in fact, to start quoting lines and predicting favorite parts. One of the kids' favorite funny lines is from Yukon Cornelius himself. When the gang is floating through the fog on their homemade iceberg, Yukon comments, "This fog is as think as peanut butter."

Hermie then corrects, "Don't you mean pea soup?"

YC then counters with, "You eat what you want. I'll eat what I want!"

Both kids giggle out loud every time. The kids also like when Rudolph jabs the snow monster in the butt with his antlers.

One of my favorite parts is when Yukon's dogs won't mush. He shouts at them but they won't move. So Yukon decides to demonstrate by pulling the sled himself. Once he does, the dogs all immediately hop on for the ride. It just reminds me of what our own dog would probably do.

Along with the trip down memory lane, I noticed a couple of puzzling moments from the show which, for some reason, I was unable to let go. Now I know that Rudolph isn't a documentary and it was made over forty years ago, but I just couldn't shake my need for answers.

What started my curiosity was in the first 'Island of Misfit Toys' scene. I understand why the toys were there. Those toys were messed up! Come on! No one could ever want a spotted elephant, right? But I couldn't figure out the Dolly on the island. Aside from wearing a short plaid skirt in the middle of winter, what qualified her as a misfit? The show may have explained it when my attention was occupied with the jelly squirting water gun, so maybe I missed it for the last four decades.

Another inconsistency involved the bird who couldn't fly but could swim. At the very end of the special, Santa's head elf in charge of umbrellas cold heartedly denied the flightless swimming bird his umbrella and rudely shoved him out of the sleigh high above the clouds. It's true! See for yourself.

And what about the king of the misfit island. A flying lion named Moonracer? I have no problem with an avian-feline but isn't the name 'Moonracer' just a bit too 1960's hippie?

Hopefully, I haven't ruined the 'Island' for you now but I just have a couple more observations.

Firstly, when Rudolph sets out on his own because he is worried that he is putting his friends in danger, he leaves the door to their cottage WIDE OPEN! Guess he isn't worried about his 'friends' catching pneumonia.

And lastly, when Mrs. Santa is trying to get Santa to eat multiple times during the show, has anyone looked at the cooking she does for him? Each time she says he's too skinny, Santa has a plate of some grayish purple blob on his plate. And it matches the grayish purple apple and some other mystery consumable. If I didn't know better, I'd think Mrs. Claus was cooking clay in the kitchen.

But other than all of those things, we still enjoyed our evening together. We still sang Silver and Gold together. We still flicked our tongues in and out when Cornelius licked his pick ax for precious metals. Which also begs the question, who licks metal objects in freezing cold weather?

Next week, we're going to watch 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas' and I'm going to point out, to the kids, how all of those Who instruments couldn't possibly work. And there is no such thing as roast beast.

The Kitchen's Alive With The Sound Of Music

2009-12-01T08:10:00.001-06:00

We've always known Number One Son has had an ear for music. When he was a toddler we noticed him keeping the beat with his baby dances. In kindergarten we were surprised by N1S's music teacher when she told us of his solo in the upcoming vocal concert. He has been taking piano lessons for the last five years and even though he hates to practice, we can't let him quit because he has a knack for it. He can usually figure out a melody from memory and play it after a few tries.

We've always known he's had sensitive ears. When he was young, his hands were always jumping to his ears whenever a loud, unexpected noise would pop up. He hated automatic flushing toilets because he couldn't predict when they would flush and he didn't want his hands busy zipping when they were needed to plug his ears.

Which leads us to a day he experienced in music class last year. His fourth grade music teacher was playing a tune on the piano when N1S asked her if the song was in the key of G. His piano teacher had been teaching him recently about how to read which key music is written in. We had no idea that he was learning to listen for the key as well as reading it. N1S's music teacher did a double take when he asked her the key to the song she was playing. He was right, of course.

His teacher then announced to the fourth grade choir that they were going to try a little experiment with N1S. She played a note on the middle octave of the piano. When N1S answered correctly, she moved on to random notes on the upper and lower octaves. When he got those right she moved to the black keys. After that, she had to admit that N1S had something called perfect pitch. In other words, he can hear any random note out of the blue and know which one it is on the scale.

Needless to say, we were pretty excited about the news. So what do we do next? Is there a special school we need to find? Should we call Oprah before she retires? Is 'Name That Tune' game show still on TV?

I think we will just sit tight and let N1S use his special power as he sees fit.

Like last weekend when I was making lunch for both of us. (Heating up leftover pizza in the microwave).

N1S informed me that the hum of the microwave was the same pitch as the hum of the computer and also matched the beep of the microwave when the food is done. So as the timer approached single digits, I hummed to myself to match the hum of the microwave. At zero seconds the microwave beep matched my hum. I said to myself, "Well, anyone could've noticed that." "What note is it N1S?"

"D"

And the piano proved him right. So if anyone needs to know if their microwave is in tune or not, give N1S a call.

What Happens at N1S's, Stays at N1S's

2009-11-23T18:00:00.012-06:00

It's party time! That's what Lady Di announced to Number One Son last week. LD thought N1S might like to host a get together for a few of his friends on Saturday night. And by night, she meant 3pm to 7pm.

So N1S got his guest list together and invited four friends for food, fun and video games. And as far as N1S was concerned, the fun and the video games were one in the same.

With a stack of pizzas, a tote of chips and a wheel barrow of pop bottles, we seemed adequately prepared for a fun afternoon.

Lady Di set out the snacks while the pizza cooked and set out the Pokeno game for the boys. You may ask, "How can Pokeno possibly compete with the Wii Mario Cart?" The answer is, you play for money.

Now hold on! Before you call child services, we're not running a bawdy, underground gambling house for fifth graders. We just didn't have any good prizes for winning so we used pennies. We only had one boy object based on moral grounds, but he quickly changed his mind and agreed to try gambling just this once. Although, I don't know how you could call it gambling since I was the only one who provided any money. Anyway the Dr. Pepper, Mountain Dew and Cheetos went a long way towards buying the boys' reticence to the gaming commission.

The boys played 'four corners, bingo and blackout' and the winner of each game would get a cup of pennies with the intention of counting up at the end of the game to see which boy had the most. Well, towards the end, one boy hadn't won a single game and therefore had an empty cup. When he made this known to the group, two of the other boys just said, "Here, you can have mine.", and dumped their winnings into his cup. Needless to say, by this time the boys were becoming much less interested in pennies and more interested in the pizza smell coming from the oven.

I don't know if we overestimated what five fifth graders could eat, or we set out too many snacks during the game, because the boys only finished off a pizza and a half before diving for the Wii remotes. That left us with about a pizza and a half left. But I won't ever complain about leftovers.

With all of the boys in the house, we didn't want Sweet Pea to feel left out, so one of N1S's guest's sister came to play with her.

They did their best at attacking the pizza too.

The rest of the party was spent playing Mario Cart and Guitar Hero and trying to see who could shout over every one else. I thought a group of fifth grade girls were loud but these boys could keep up with them any day. They were laughing, cheering, joking and each one wanted to outdo the other. And N1S was right in the middle, going along with the group. Readers to this blog will know of some of the challenges N1S has had with friendships and peer interaction. But this night couldn't have gone better. Nobody was teased. All participated. And everyone had fun.

Even though the above picture turned out blurry, it is still my favorite one. One of the most important wishes for a parent of a child with Asperger's is for their child to be included and feel like he really belongs. N1S did well in choosing his friends. I know he won't always fit in everywhere, but the times he does fit in makes my heart swell.

By 7:30pm the parents came to pick up some pretty exhausted and somewhat hoarse kids.

So if you look past the junk food, video games, belching contest and gambling, N1S and Lady Di hosted a pretty good party.

Now Sweet Pea has informed us that she is ready for her girl party.

Time to buy ear plugs.

Tender Is The Night

2009-11-15T08:29:00.002-06:00

I recently experienced a tender moment as the kids were getting ready for bed. I have no idea what was wrong with the kids, but it just happened.

After supper, Lady Di thought it would be fun to play a family game before bedtime. The kids, of course, were all for that. With suspiciously little arguing, we decided to play Trouble. But after multiple trips up and down the basement stairs, we could find no Trouble. So LD brought up the game, Sorry. I braced myself for loud and vociferous protests and debate from the kids. I was greeted with tranquil acceptance.

I felt their foreheads to make sure they both hadn't come down with a fever that was causing them to act so strangely.

But their heads were cool so we kicked off game night. Now when I play board games I really don't care if I win or lose. I just like to tease, mock and get the kids all worked up every time I happen to move my little green Hershey Kiss playing piece a square or two ahead of theirs. My favorite thing to do is to start singing, 'I Am the Champion' to Queen's tune of 'We Are The Champions". But tonight, they just let me sing and dance and promptly sent my Sorry Guys back to home a hopeless number of times.

The beginning of the game started with Number One Son getting every good card available and Sweet Pea receiving the exact opposite. With her luck, I was half expecting SP to draw an Old Maid or an Uno Draw Four card mixed in with the Sorry cards.

But as these games always do, eventually everyone's positions on the board evened out and everyone got to send everyone else home at least once. But in the end, N1S couldn't get the right card and Lady Di snuck in the back door and won. Again, I gritted my teeth and squinted my eyes to prepare for "No Fair!", and "You Cheated!" followed by an airborne board and a snow storm of cards.

But no, only a long "Awwwwww", feigning disappointment and both kids searching through the remaining cards to see how many more turns it would've taken for them to win. They even helped put the game away.

Whose kids are these and where are N1S and SP!?

Bedtime snack was a rice krispie bar without any measuring or comparing to make sure each kid had the same number of krispies.

Then after brushing their teeth, the most incredible event of the night occurred.

SP asked N1S if he wanted to read her a bedtime story. And he said, "Sure."

I know everyone has good days and bad days, including myself. But tonight was definitely a good day for the kids. A lot of things went right. A lot of good choices were made. It all added up to a fun-filled, memorable night for us.

After cleaning up the snack dishes I went upstairs to peek in on them in N1S's room. They were taking turns reading the Dr Suess story, Sneetches.

Then I went to SP's room and I found out what she had done with her free time this afternoon.
Apparently, she had constructed a bath robe hammock for all of her stuffed animals.

Yes, this was a very good day.

Alms For The Poor

2009-11-12T07:58:00.003-06:00

It sure has been awhile since my last post. For some reason, I just haven't had the desire or energy to blog or facebook or anything computer related. We've been busy but that's no excuse because we are always busy.

I finally took down all of the Halloween decorations and have started on the Christmas lights. I wanted to get the roof lights done while the weather was nice. I have a few outdoor trees strung also, but will not turn them on until after Thanksgiving.

Last weekend we were able to enjoy both kids in the children's musical Alms For The Poor. We were lucky enough to have two great-grandmothers, two sets of grandparents, two sets of great-aunts and uncles, one aunt and a couple of cousins in attendance for at least one of the performances. The kids really appreciated the support too.

They both did a wonderful job. Sweet Pea was one of the beggar children dancers. Her team opened the show depicting children playing in the street. SP played the bully child. In her dance she got to take a doll from another girl, kick some jacks on the ground and roll her eyes and with her hands on her hips when the jump rope girls wouldn't give her a turn. She got to use lots of frowns and sighs and all kinds of bratty actions. She did such a good job I wasn't sure if she was even 'acting'.

Here she is frowning.

And here she is fighting.

Lady Di did a good job on SP's hair. Her hair took up so much of the stage they almost had to write in another part just for her pony tails. SP is in the back row, second from the left.

Number One Son played the role of Tellie, a boy living on the streets. He also did a great job considering he was fighting a bad cough with on and off fever. We had to give him an orange juice IV every morning just to get him well enough to sing.

Once again, the kids made message boxes for the audience to fill with notes and candy during intermission. So it was just like another Halloween haul.

This was SP's first play and N1S's fourth. The children's director also wrote this story and music for her eleventh production.

The kids had a wonderful time working hard to put on the show. N1S reconnected with friends he made from previous shows. I hope both kids will want to do it all again next year. Hopefully, when they are both healthy.

Dead Man's Party

2009-11-01T02:04:00.006-06:00

I hope that every one's night of fright was filled with sweets, scares and only a few tricks. We had a cool night but the wind died down just in time to provide a perfect evening for Lady Di and the kids to fill bags with candy. I was put on house duty and doled out treats to around sixty ghouls and goblins.

This year, we tried a new mix of Halloween candy. In addition to Snickers and Butterfingers, we added Pringles Stix, Animal Crackers and Grips Chips Deluxe packs. The parents of the younger trick or treaters appreciated the Animal Crackers. I was surprised to see the Pringle Stix going faster than any of the chocolate. I don't know if it was because it looked like something new, or because it was the longest package in the bowl. Regardless, at the end of the night, we were left with only ten Snickers and two Animal Crackers. Which just happened to be exactly what I had calculated to be my cut for the evening.

The kids used scary and pretty costumes to help them in their candy begging.

Sweet Pea picked out a harlequin mask and went as a Mardi Gras diva. She had no idea what Mardi Gras was, but she still accepted each compliment with a 'Thank You'. She just liked the mask at the store. Number One Son wore a skull mask with a camouflage hat. An old graduation gown from the dress up box in the basement, completed his costume.

And for those that were unable to view our house decorations this year, here is my annual pumpkin round up for this season. We only carved nine gourds this year.

I started with this 'Boo' pumpkin because it was rotten when we brought it home and I didn't want to spend too much time carving it.

These two are N1S's 'rock star' and SP's 'rock star groupie' pumpkins. I think SP was going for a pumpkin with H1N1 but I wouldn't let her use pumpkin guts for the vomit. But with the little blings she put on the pumpkin, it looks like she's screaming to her favorite rock song. So much so, that you can see the little 'white mint' in her mouth. N1S's might be Ace Frehley.

The kids also carved these two by themselves. It looks like SP's eyebrow got a little too involved with her eye on this one.

These two were a couple that I carved. I don't think they turned out too bad.

And this one was my favorite. At the pumpkin stand I had to buy it because it's shape was almost exactly like a skull. So I tried to carve a skull face and didn't butcher it too badly.

That is pretty much our Halloween. Now comes the task of disposing of all of the candy the kids carted home. I'm sure I'll find a way.

Revenge of the Great Pumpkin

2009-10-24T05:32:00.011-06:00

Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. I like to decorate the house with lights, ghouls and, of course pumpkins. So this spring, I decided to plant a pumpkin patch in my back yard.

My seeds started off strong. I had almost all of my mounds sprout with multiple plants. It wasn't long before I got my first bloom too. As the weeks went by, more blooms would appear but no pumpkins. So I went on-line to find out what the secret was. Apparently, pumpkin vines have male blooms and female blooms. This information would have been useful on the seed package. Anyway, since there is a shortage of bees to transfer pollen from the male blooms to the female blooms, we sometimes have to help them along.

So in order to set the mood for my blooms to get together and make a pumpkin, I dimmed the lights, played a romantic Barry White song on my ipod and left a tray of oysters and chocolates on the ground. When that didn't work, I went back to the Internet which told me how to gently transfer pollen.

Once that was done, amazingly, I had a small pumpkin starting to grow. I knew then that I was going to earn my farmer's tan this year. In my excitement, I visited it everyday and watered it every other day to make sure it wouldn't dry out.

After about two weeks, I noticed my little pumpkin getting smaller and wrinklier and eventually it fell off the vine. I also noticed about half of my plants were getting sick and withering. I thought, maybe I was watering too much. So I let them dry out a while, which seemed to help.

It was quite a while before I got any more female blooms. I guess they are much rarer than males. So I did some more match making when I did get the right blooms, but these pumpkins did the same thing by growing for awhile before dying. This was around the end of August. My garden was looking more pathetic by the day.

So I figured there must be an anti-pumpkin hex on my garden. And the only way to get rid of an A-P hex is with a scarecrow, of course. But even that didn't seem to help.

So a friend of mine suggested that they might not be getting enough sunshine. Since I planted my garden among some shade trees, this could be true.

So I got my chain saw out and leveled all the trees in the backyard. No, I really only trimmed a couple of branches that were hanging over the garden. But by this time, it seemed too late for any pumpkins of size. So I concentrated on nurturing the few small lemon-sized orbs I had.

I watered a little, propped up a few vines a little and prayed a little. But my plants continued to look sickly and miserable.

And then....., a miracle!

On the week before Halloween, my garden exploded with orange spheres of all sizes and shapes. Some were oval. Some round. Small, medium, large and extra large. It was incredible! I could hardly believe it! It was almost as if someone had mysteriously loaded up a truck load of pumpkins from the local farmers market and dumped them into my garden before anyone had a chance to catch him in the act.

I guess my farmer's tan wasn't wasted after all. However the pumpkins got there, they will be put to good use on All Hallow's Eve, frightening and delighting trick-or-treaters of all ages.

I think I will try growing pumpkins again next year. I may also try a few new things just to see what will come out of the ground. I'll have a good eight months to think about it anyway.

The Anniversary Caper

2009-10-20T07:53:00.013-06:00

Last week, Lady Di and I celebrated fourteen years of wedded bliss. So I went to Hallmark to read the master list of acceptable gifts for number one-four. I searched and searched but could not find any tools on any of the lists. All I could hope for was that this year was the year of the 'it's the thought that counts' gift. No luck. The traditional gift was ivory and the modern gift is gold jewelry. I thought, "Ah come on! Gold for the fourteenth? What ever happened to the golden anniversary being the fiftieth?" I seriously believe that jewelers, most of them women, made sure that some sort of gold was assigned to every four and a half anniversaries to boost sales and their own jewelry boxes. And how was I going to bag an elephant for the traditional ivory gift?

With my options limited to those, I decided to play dumb and go in a different direction.

I started with picking a weekend that I could get someone to watch our kids. Luckily, LD's sister stepped up and magnanimously volunteered to entertain her niece and nephew with a sleep over.

My plan was to trick LD into thinking that we were going to her sister's house for a game night and stay over. Once we arrived at her house, we said good bye to the kids and I hustled LD out to the van before she knew what was going on.

We then drove about twenty miles to a bed and breakfast. I think LD was surprised. We stayed upstairs in the Edna room. After unpacking, we had dinner at the Gasthaus German restaurant. This was the first time either of us had been to one. The food was good and the beer was better.We even had our very own personal accordion player, Hilda. Actually, her name wasn't Hilda and she played for everyone at the restaurant. But we did get to visit with her quite a bit and she even played a song for our anniversary. After dinner we had to decide what to do next. Should we go downtown for a drink or dance the night away at a club? We chose to go back to our bed and breakfast and play Monopoly in our room. I know, the city sure didn't have to call in any extra law enforcement for our wild night out, but sometimes spending a quiet, comfortable evening alone with your spouse is as much fun as anything.Here is a picture of our room. Our bed was very comfortable and we slept very soundly even with that picture of Edna Mulvey on the wall watching us.

Before bed I told LD to set the alarm for the 9am breakfast. She said she was going to sleep in. I told her, we paid for breakfast, we're eating breakfast!

The next morning we ate stuffed french toast with four other couples in the main dining room. I'm always nervous about eating with a group of people I don't know. I'm not very much of a talker. But I didn't need to be because two other people at the table did enough talking for all twelve of us.

Mercifully, the talkers got tired of all of our listening and we were able to get back to our room to pack up and check out.

We spent the rest of the afternoon walking up and down the town's main street visiting many boutiques, antique stores and sweet shoppes. Why do retailers think they can charge more just because they have French spelled words over their doors? After much window shopping, I was ready to head for home.

But first, we had to pick up the kids.

They had spent the afternoon at the pumpkin patch. It was great for Auntie Sue and Uncle Tom to take them because we hadn't time all Fall to schedule it in ourselves. They enjoyed carmel apples, face paint and got to run through the corn maze. No one got lost in the corn and they found all of the dinosaur signs.

When we came to pick them up they were pretty exhausted. But not too exhausted for Lego Indiana Jones video game at Auntie's.

They were very disappointed that they couldn't stay with their aunt and uncle longer. We were already missing them and they were complaining that we were there to pick them up. I think we all were a little tired.

Bring Out Yer Dead!

2009-10-15T05:51:00.011-06:00

Last weekend officially kicked off the outside-of-the-house decorating season. I just happened to have the weekend off, the weather was cool but not cold, and it was October.

I climbed the ladder to the attic to unearth our stock of orange, black and blood. Our supply of Halloween decorations doubled this year due to a clearance sale last year and very generous in-laws taking advantage of said sale for gifts last Christmas.

I know it's still a little early to decorate, but the snow flurries were also too early this year so it seems later than it really is. That's what my excuse is anyway.

First, the orange lights made it atop the porch gutter, luckily without another ladder mishap. I took my phone to the roof with me this time, just in case.

Then it was time to position the lighted ghosts, pumpkins and skulls. The number of skulls in the box seemed to have multiplied since last year. And the number of Styrofoam tombstones more than doubled. It appears that I did not take proper inventory of our tombstones before filling up my cart at Menards this year. But it actually worked out rather well since I was putting up an archway over our sidewalk to look like a cemetery entrance. And cemeteries need tombstones, don't they? Since I am too cheap to buy an archway, I made one from a section of framework to a metal deck gazebo. I zip-clipped some lights and a graveyard sign and now I have a cemetery.

This was actually the least blurry picture I took. I don't know why, but every picture I took that night was jittery. Must be all the excitement for Halloween.

Also new to the haunt is a skeleton swinging from our 'gallows tree' and a bush full of lighted eye balls.

As you can see, my photography was as unsteady as ever. I took three pictures of this tree and all three looked like the leaves were on fire.

Here's our eye bush to make sure trick or treaters don't try any tricks.

The main attraction, however, is our new pet spider. His legs move and Liberty likes to bark at it every morning.

And my camera work made it look even hairier.

Here is a homemade ghoul I made out of an old artificial X-mas tree pole, some black cloth and a Styrofoam jack-o-lantern from the hardware store. His head is white and his eyes light up red. I'm kind of happy of the way it and the photo turned out.

Lastly, I had some left over orange lights without a tree or door to place them on. So I stuck them under the front porch. In the dark they glow up through the deck boards making it look mysterious.

And guess what? It looks like I lit porch on fire.

I just have a few more items to put out on Halloween night along with multiple jack-o-lanterns if I get the time to carve them.

Well, that's enough jumpy, fire photography for tonight. If you want to see our decorations for real, come on by on All Hallow's Eve and you will be sure to get a treat.

Go Knights!

2009-10-12T07:56:00.002-06:00

Last week was Homecoming Week for our school district. During Homecoming week, every day had a different theme. Sweet Pea was very diligent in reminding us of each day's theme. She had PJ day, rock star day and wacky hair day. And with SP's long hair, the wackiness that Lady Di designed, took about 30 minutes to prepare.

Number One Son's week had similar daily themes. Although, his school included an Erkel day. Firstly, N1S had to ask us who Erkel was. When he found out it was 'nerd' day, he asked me to help him find clothes. Now why would he think I knew anything about nerd clothes? I didn't have the heart to tell him that 'nerd day' was yesterday and everyone at school loved his costume.

Just kidding.

So Friday came and we all were excited to see the football game. Well, N1S and I were excited. SP asked Mom if she could just stay home with her. Which Lady Di was all in favor of, except for the fact that N1S and SP got invited to a friend's house for a pre-homecoming party. When it was time for the game, we picked up the boys from the party to drive them to the game. SP and her friend stayed at the party.

The boys had extra Dr. Pepper fueled school spirit that led them all to paint their faces in school colors.

With faces like those, there was no chance our team would lose.

The evening's weather, however, was not playing fair. The temperature hovered in the upper forties with a cold wind blowing misty/drizzly/rain around. The grandstand's aluminum bench seats are uncomfortable in perfect weather, but when they are cold and wet, you find out just how strong your school support is.

The only true damper to our spirits came when N1S and his group of friends were stopped by a teacher at the game and told to wash off their face paint. Apparently, full face paint is against school policy, due to an unidentifiable game crashing streaker at last year's game. Although, I did see many other kids with similar faces so I asked N1S about that.

He said in a disgusted way, "Yeah, there's only like two teachers at the whole game telling people to wash their faces!". Lucky him, I guess.

Even so, he and his friends had a good time. This was the first game we just let him run on his own. Our team played well too and was ahead 28 to 0 at halftime. After that, the weather was too powerful against our school spirit. We left halfway through the third quarter like quite a few fans. Football players may like to play in cold rain, but fans generally dislike it.

At the end of the night, we gathered both kids and they pretty much fell asleep on their way to bed.

Oops! He Did It Again.

2009-10-04T09:34:00.024-06:00

This weekend the weather was cold, rainy and windy. A perfect day for an unimaginably long run through the streets of Minneapolis to St. Paul. Or so our nephew, Kubes, thought. This Sunday, Kubes again ran in the Twin Cities marathon. I think this is Kubes' fourth or fifth marathon, so I'm telling everyone it's his eleventh.

Ever the good aunt, Lady Di called him the night before to give him his pep talk. I was just going to tell him to 'run fast'. I also had a piece of advice handed down by my never reticent, Grampa Pete. He would always tell me, "If you get tired of walking, you can always run a ways."

This Sunday morning after church, Lady Di ventured to St. Paul to be at the finish line when Kubes came sprinting by. Kubes estimated about three hours to finish the race so LD would be there at the right time. Kubes official time was three hours and five minutes. I can't believe he was so insensitive to make his poor aunt wait five whole minutes for him.

Still, we are very proud of him and hope he continues to impress us with even lower times.

Lady Di was also inspired by many other runners. Three of our neighbors ran and finished strong. Two other runners ran barefoot. See Kubes, I told you, you should've brought a box of thumbtacks just in case. LD saw a husband and wife team finish hand in hand then break down and cry with each other. Lady Di needed all of her self restraint to keep from jumping the fence and adding her tears to theirs. I know if LD and I had run together, I would have had tears too. But I would have had them at the four and half mile marker from my side ache. LD also cheered on a dad pushing his daughter in her racing wheelchair. It reminded her of the dad from the CAN video. LD was so moved by the day that she vowed to bring more Kleenex tissues next year.

The weather and homework prevented the kids and I from attending. Maybe next year we will get the opportunity to root for our fastest nephew again. Who knows, maybe LD and I will be running side by side with Kubes. For the first hundred feet or so.

Homecoming King

2009-09-29T21:24:00.013-06:00

This post doesn't involve a cute picture of our kids. It won't have a witty retelling of an embarrassing moment. What it does contain, is an inspiring and touching story of some great kids from Montivideo, MN.

This story aired on our local news tonight. Lady Di and I both had trouble keeping our eyes dry.
This video shows the love and respect this student body has for one of its classmates. It makes me proud to live in the same state as these kids. And inspires me with hope for the future. A future of acceptance and empathy. I would feel blessed if our kids grew up to be as compassionate as the kids from this school.
I'm sure many parents will connect with this student's parents.
Here is the link if you are interested.
http://www.wcco.com/video/?id=67796@wcco.dayport.com

I'm Ready For My Closeup.

2009-09-26T20:43:00.001-06:00

We recently were the recipients of good news in our home. We found out that both kids received parts in the upcoming fall musical. Sweet Pea used her sugary sweetness, combined with booty shakin' choreography at her audition to win over the directors with a song she learned at Girl Scouts. Number One Son sang a few verses of 'If I Only Had a Brain'. He hid a piece of cotton in his hand to pull out of his ear for the 'head all full of stuffin' verse which wowed the judges. And it must have worked because he got one of the lead roles again this year. SP got a part as a dancer in her first production.

Both kids are excited for the play this year. The show they are in is called Alms For the Poor. Sounds like another light hearted romp, huh?

Actually, it was written by the main director of our local children's productions. Two years ago, N1S was in the show 3-6-9 Kid about the Holocaust which she also authored. We like that this director is brave enough to try some serious subjects along with comedies.

This theatre season started out a little rocky for N1S. He contracted the flu and had to miss the first practice. But don't worry, Sweet Pea went to practice and forgot her script, songbook and music CD there, just like he usually does on the first night. Luckily, N1S recovered by the end of the week to make his appearance at the second practice. Mom and Dad also went to gather up all of the needed paperwork.

Since this is N1S's fourth production, he has quite a few friends that have been in previous shows with him. I guess he's one of the big-wigs now since he's in fifth grade. At least we think he's a big-wig. This year the play was open for kids in second through eighth grade for auditions.

Sweet Pea, on the other hand, has always thought of herself as a big-wig. After N1S's performance in Hansel and Gretel last year, SP walked up to the director and told her that she was going to be in next year's play. Well, I guess she was right. As I said, she is a dancer in this play. After the first practice, we found out that the director also offered her a small solo. This information comes from SP, so we don't know if it is a solo dance, song or Shakespearean sonnet. So now she's an even bigger-wig. She has attended two whole practices and has already complained that sometimes she gets tired dancing so much. And sometimes she doesn't like to practice with the 'little kids'. The 'little kids' being, other kids the same age as her. Diva behavior already? Next, she will be asking for a dressing room with Cheetos in bowls with serving spoons. Personally, I think she is finding out that being in a play involves a little bit of work along with the fun.

So hopefully, N1S can stay healthy enough to make it to opening night. And hopefully, SP will dance even without getting a private trailer with a star on the door.

My little Diva and her Bodyguard.

And I.....E-I.....E-I.....will always love yooooooou!

Friday Night Lights

2009-09-23T02:46:00.004-06:00

October is a wonderful month for many reasons. The change of seasons, colorful foliage and, of course Halloween are just some of the benefits enjoyed by our tenth month.

Another reason, and one of my favorites, is football season.

I enjoy football at all levels. I, of course, put aside my requisite 2 to 3 hours every Sunday to follow the Vikings. Although, sometimes I only use about 1 hour to actually watch the game and fill the rest of the time with a nap.

On Saturdays I like to spend the day in the yard or garage listening to multiple college football games on the radio.

But the best football, in my mind, is played on Friday night. I love high school football games. I was fortunate enough to have had the opportunity to play football in high school. Along with all of the bruises and sore muscles, I received many memories and enjoyed many friendships from those four years long ago.

Our high school football teams had our up and down years, but I valued each year equally high. My high school was rather small compared to most. My graduating class had an enrollment of thirty. With such a small talent pool to choose from, our teams gave our athletes their money's worth of playing time.

Our numbers would fluctuate so much that we would switch back and forth from 11-man to 9-man football every other year. One year we even played an 8-man game. In my sophomore year, our team was still in rebuilding mode and suffered more injuries than usual. On the last game of the season we travelled to our opponent's field with thirteen players to play an eleven man game. So simple math will tell you that all but two players started and played on offence and defence. And out of the two players left on the sidelines, only one of them could play because the other freshman forgot his hip pads at home. Luckily, he didn't have to play. But we did have one injury in that game that required our last eligible player to enter the battle. Across the field, the other team lined up with around thirty extra players. They had plenty but wouldn't loan any to us. We did pretty well that game but still lost 6 to 0.

I was lucky enough to avoid any serious injury during my playing days. I did receive an opponent's helmet to my chin which required some stitches, but that just gave me a scar to prove to my kids that I actually played back then.

Back then, playing sports was pretty nerve wracking for me. I had certain rituals for good luck. I wore the same t-shirt under my uniform for every practice and game for four years. It was an orange t-shirt with a Kit-Kat candy bar logo on the front. And occasionally, I would let Mom wash it when it stood in the corner by itself.

Because I would get so nervous before games, I would fail to enjoy them much. I concentrated too much on what I was supposed to do, that I wouldn't stop and take it all in. I hardly ever celebrated on the field and rarely heard the crowd cheer when we made a good play.

So these days, I am making up for lost time. When I take Number One Son and Sweet Pea to our local high school stadium, I try to notice everything that is going on.

The first experience that brings back the glory days for me is hearing the pep band play as we walk across the parking lot.

The closer we get to the gate, the smell of concession stand popcorn reaches our noses. That mixes with the smell of newly mowed grass from the football field. Sometimes I stop and inhale deeply through my nostrils in an attempt to turn back time.

Once in the stands, I survey the entire field of green with precisely spaced white yard lines and numbers marking where rows of players do their pre-game calisthenics. They do the same jumping jacks and stretches that I did so long ago.

The noises of the game also bring back memories. A rumble of anticipation comes from the fans visiting in the stands. The cheerleaders shout out their routines mixing with the regular cadence of the players' warm up exercises. And then the silence before the national anthem, setting the stage for a rousing cheer to start off the contest.

Once the game starts, I observe that things look much different in the stands than I remember them on the field. Plays look much less confusing from up here. Today's players also seem to be faster than in my day. Regardless of today's changes, the game is still pretty much the same. The teams and stadiums are bigger. And so is my enjoyment of the game, because I enjoy the little things that go along with the game much more. Little things that I was too nervous to enjoy before.

I haven't kept in touch very well with many of my teammates over the years. But the feeling of being brothers on a team, united in one goal hasn't dimmed in me. When I do correspond with teammates of old, the past rushes back to me and is as vivid as when I first experienced it.

Here we are in our senior football yearbook photo. Quite the menacing group in our home orange jerseys. #34 was an all-state running back for us that year. #23 was a state champion wrestler. #56 is a great dad to three girls. #51 owns his own ice cream business out west and is still the school record holder in the discus. #66 has travelled the world with the Air Force. He is currently stationed in North Carolina. And #82 is still a dork.